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I sat on our leather couch, gazing into the concerned faces of two of my best friends, Em and Mike. I’d known them my whole life that I could remember and I’d spent the best times of my life with them. I wished they were here for something other than what I had to tell them. My sister sat next to me, holding my hand for support. This was hard, harder than I imagined, but I knew I wasn’t going to lose it, I had prepared for this moment.
“I know you’re probably wondering what’s so important that I had to have you come up here and spend the weekend,” I said.
“Yeah, what’s going on? Is everything ok?” asked Em.
“Actually no. Well, you know how I was having those horrible headaches. We went and had some tests done, and…” my voice broke off, a lump formed in my throat. My sister squeezed my hand, “well this isn’t easy to say, but they found something, and that something is a… t-tumor,” my voice cracking on the last word.
“What? I mean, are you—is every…are you going to be ok?” Mike managed to stutter out. I didn’t respond at first, I couldn’t. I looked into their eyes and saw that they knew what I couldn’t say. I saw that they were waiting, and hoping that I would tell them otherwise, but everyone in the room knew that I wouldn’t, because it was true. I was going to die.
“The doctors gave me 6 months at most… it’s too far along they said,”
“Can’t they do anything?” Em asked, tears rolling down her freckled cheek
“Too many risks,” my sister said quietly. I just sat and watched the three people I love most in this world cry. Em and molly hugged, and Mike just sat with his head in his hands. I couldn’t see his face. All I wanted to do was look into his eyes and re-assure him, but I knew there was nothing I could say. After a few minutes I spoke again. “Uh, Can I talk to you Mike…alone?” He looked up and I saw that his eyes were red.
“Of course,” Molly and Em walked out of the room taking a box of tissues with them. After they were gone I sat still for a moment staring straight ahead. After a moment, I got up and sat down next to Mike. I put my hand on his and gave it a light squeeze. He looked over.
“You don’t deserve this, you are one of the best people I know, how could god just let you die?”
“I don’t think it’s like that,”
“Then what is it like? I don’t understand how anyone can take you away from us. You must be one of god’s most perfect creations, and he’s just going to take you away,”
“I know it’s hard to accept, impossible maybe, but it’s true, and I have something really important to tell you,”
“Anything,” I took a deep breath.
“Mike, I love you. And not in the ‘you’re on of my best friends’ way. I am in love with you Mike. I am so in love with you,” He didn’t say anything, “I don’t expect you to say anything in return, and I’m not asking you to feel the same way, bu—“ before I could finish my sentence, he pulled my lips to his, and before I could even think about it were in the middle of the softest sweetest kiss anyone could imagine. After a few minutes we pulled away, resting our foreheads together.
“I love you too,” he whispered before pulling me into his arms. We sat like that for hours, before I fell asleep, safe in his arms.
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Parting is all we know of heaven and all we need of hell.