Lifetime Lost | Teen Ink

Lifetime Lost

December 20, 2014
By MyFinalDestiny GOLD, Central City, Pennsylvania
MyFinalDestiny GOLD, Central City, Pennsylvania
10 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"stay golden" the outsiders

I look into the Golden rimmed body mirror and sigh deeply. That girl is there again, standing there looking at me with that same confused expression. "who is she? why is she there? whats her purpose?" I ask myself silently everytime i see her.
Short hair and deep brown eyes that are constantly filled with worry. Semi-Aging wrinkles, and an average build. She never actually speaks a word to me.. Although at times She must find it fun to annoy me because for some reason she keeps copying my movements. Almost like a game of simon says.. only I didnt tell her to do it.
I ask her why she's there and she just mouths the words right back at me. Almost as if shes on the other side wondering what im doing on this side. As if this mirror is a portal to her dimension. It frustrates me that she wont answer my questions. One day i remember it got so bad i threw a cup at the mirror and chipped the corner of it. The girl didnt come back for a week.
The week without her i felt so lonely and i regreted throwing the cup. When she did return though she still continued to do everything she did before, which angered me again. Only this time i didnt throw things. i Knew if she left again i'd be devasted. Knock Knock.  My head shoots up and i look at the mirror.
The girl has come closer to it and its smiling weakly. I looked at her shocked and step closer to the mirror. She motions with her finger to get even closer. I take a few more steps till im right in front of the mirror. Her lips part and try to form words but i hear nothing.
She frowns and then suddenly she grins. She opens her mouth and breathes on the mirror, causing it to fog up. I look at her and watch as she takes her finger and writes on the mirror. "I am You. You are me." I tilt me head and look at her confused. But as soon as she wrote that i noticed the resemblence. The same deep brown eyes. Different hair lengths but still the same colour. The main difference is that her face is now covered in beautiful aging wrinkles. The wrinkles give her a more concerned appeal.
I gasp slightly and ask her. "Why are you here! What message are you tryng to tell me!?" She sighs and breathes on the mirror again. "Have no regrets young one. Please dont live in the past. You need to move on."
"What does that even mean!?" I question. The message disappears and she fogs up the mirror again. "You need to stop regretting the past! Dont spend your life worrying about what you didnt do!" She writes then slowly backs up and smiles. I look at her and slowly watch as the backround behind her starts to disappear and turns to darkness. She gives me one last finally wave and goes into the darkness. "No!!!" I shout. I grab my head and sigh in frustration. "what does she mean wake up!? im so confused! What past!" I let out a small cry. I dig through my mind and then finally it hits me.
"I'm the past... " i whisper to myself. I look up at the now blank mirror. Memories flood through my mind and i realize. Maybe she meant.. that im so busy focusing on all the bad of the past that ive been stuck into the past. therefore i can't continue my life as it should be... Those feelings of regret and sorrow have kept me from living life and its costing me my future!
  I stand up and walk to the mirror. Sorrow fills me and i feel regret on the fact that i havent experienced my future. I place one hand on it and say loudly. "I'm ready to forget the past. I want to wake up! Wake me up!! Now!!" At first nothing happened. Then after a few minutes  The walls around me shake a little and soon they turn into the memories of the future im missing out on. I turn and look at them sadly.
This is what i missed out on while i was stuck in the past. And now, i must try to move on with life. I must live it to its fullest. For better or for worse! I think this to myself as i take a step towards the memories, my future. I've missed so much! My first love. My marriage and first born. The memories of my children growing up. I've missed it all. But now is my chance to fix it. Live the life that i have left! . Before stepping into them i turn and look at the mirror. "Goodbye Regrets, And goodbye My Past."

The author's comments:

Ive noticed lately that I've been living in my past. Im regretting things that ive done and ive realized. I need to move on from that. If i spend forever in the Past then eternity wont hold my future. I just need to let go of all the bad and move on in life. 

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