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Waking up to yet another perfectly planned out day can really give you a sense of failure. Every second of every day can be nothing but perfect; but that's 'mom' for you i guess. Always having to control my life. I guess its understandable, since I'm an only child, and she doesn't have a husband to boss around. She got stuck with me. What a bummer. What ever happened to being your own person? Ha, yeah right. I can see through my bathroom mirror that mommy dearest took the liberty of setting out my perfectly ironed clothes, again. She really needs to get a life of her own, she won't be able to have mine forever. I quickly change, put my make up on, and brush my teeth. I run downstairs, stopping dead in my tracks, forgetting my volleyball gear upstairs. It's too late, she noticed. Slowly, she shakes her head, lifting her usual cup of coffee to her lips, "Forgetting your stuff is not part of the schedule. However, i had a feeling you would." She says, as she lifts my duffle bag onto the counter. I give her an apologetic look as i grab my backpack off the table, and dart for the door. I feel her hand, heavy on my shoulder, as she pulls me to face her once again. "Don't forget, you have to put up the posters for Homecoming Queen, and you have a chemistry exam tomorrow, so don't overwork yourself at practice today. I expect you to be perfect. If your not the best, then you're worthless to me. Are we clear?" She barks, gripping my arm tighter. "Yes mama," I say. A look of disgust appears on her face as she turns around and heads back to the kitchen; leaving me standing there, fresh tears ruining my perfect make up.
I throw my stuff in the back of my Mustang and race over to my boyfriend's house. Of course, he's already waiting outside. "Hey love," he says as he clI'mbs into the passenger's seat, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek. He saw how red and swollen my eyes were and I'mmediately reached for my keys, pulling them out of the ignition. "What did she say now?" Anger flashes in his eyes, a mixture of worry and sadness takes over his face; as if he feels the hurt too.
I love that he understands me.
"Nothing, its fine. You in the mood for donuts?" I ask, trying to change the subject, but he knows me too well. He slides me closer to hI'm, wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my forehead. "I love you," he whispers into my ear. I give up trying to be the strong, independent girl, and cry a river of sorrow and hatred. 20 minutes later, he kisses away the tears, gets out of the car, goes around to the drivers side, and drives us to school.
"OKAY LADIES, LINE IT UP, ITS TIME FOR SERVING PRACTICE!" Coach Runger yells as soon as study hall is over. "Move it Shay! I expect more from the captain of the Varsity Team!" Ugh, why does she always have to throw that in my face. I never wanted to be captain, it was all part of mama's schedule. Step, throw, swing, Ace! Obviously, I have to get all serves over the net, all serves inside the line, all serves have to be aces. Miss one and its all over. Step, throw, swing, Ace! "Okay, now lets work on spiking and setting. Shay! Get over here and show these amateurs how its done!" I roll my eyes as i approach the net. Step, step, jump, swing. "That's it! Exactly like that. Alright, do exactly how Shay just did! Lets go girls! I ain't got all day!" By the tI'me practice is over, I can barely keep my eyes open. I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. I check the caller Id, Dominic *smile*.
"Hey babe, you still coming over today? I miss you like crazy,'' he says. "I thought we were going to study for the chemistry exam, not make out," I giggle. "Oh. We still are. But I'm sure we'll need a few study breaks every once in a while." I can practically see hI'm grinning into the phone. "Of course I'm still coming over. I just got out of practice, I'll be over there in like 20 minutes." I say as I unlock my car door. "Alright, Just hurry. But be careful. Don't forget your seat belt. I love You." he clicks off.
I come to a stop sign, stop to check both sides of the road, and drive on. Then I hear a terrible screeching noise, I see glass everywhere, blood on the steering wheel, then...nothing.
A bright light burns my eyes as I try to gey my vision back. I look around, confused, scared. It only takes a moment to realize that I'm in the hospital. A guy in a white coat walks into the room. "Excuse me, sir, can you tell me what the hell I'm doing here?" I say, but he doesn't hear me. So I speak a little louder. "Sir, Whats going on. Why am I here?" Finally, he faces me. "Poor girl, she was so young" he whispers, and walks out the door. Curiosity overcomes me as I follow hI'm to the waiting room. When I turn the corner, I'm surprised to see my mom, talking with the man. An annoyed expression on her face. They both walk to the room, and the nurse pulls down a white sheet that covers the lifeless body that lies on the bed. I gasp, tears stinging my eyes, wen I see who it is. "Ms. Shay, I am so sorry for your loss. She was a very beautiful girl." The nurse manage to say, before she began to cry. "No, it's not a loss. She isn't my daughter. She's nothing to me. She always has been." And with that, my mom turns and walks away, leaving both the Nurse and myself, speechless.
No, no I can be dead. Its not possible. This cant be happening. Its just a dream. I'll go to Dominic's house and everything will be better. I know it. I start running, fast. Faster than I ever did before. When I get to his house, I go straight to the back. Where we always meet.
I find hI'm on his little sisters swing set, his back is facing me, his shoulders are shaking. He is crying. I run to hI'm and I'mmediately wrap my arms around hI'm, he shifts a little, but otherwise, doesn't notice me. I look over his shoulder, he is holding a picture of us at prom last year. He is sobbing loudly now, soaking the picture with his tears.
"I should of protected you!" He says. "You were everything to me! You can't be gone! You can't leave me yet! I love you! Please God Don't let it be true! You can't have her!" Hes screaming now. Screaming at the sky. Then, reality hits me. I'm dead. Dominic runs inside, goes to his dads room, pulls out the gun from under the bed, and runs outside to the street.
"You want her! You have to take me too! You don't get to take her away from me!" He puts the gun to his head, but before he can pull the trigger, a car comes speeding down the street, hits hI'm, and sends hI'm flying into the tree. "NO!" I scream. I dropped to my knees, holding my face in my hand, when I feel it. I'd recognize them anywhere. The same, strong arms that hugged me, held me for so long, that always made the pain go away. I look up to see hI'm, looking down at me. A smile slowly appears on his face. "I told you I would never leave you. I love you."