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Child of God
Where do I belong? Who am I? What is my purpose as a child of God?
These are all questions that we face at one time or another in our lives. We journey on a quest in search of the answers. We travel on an expedition to find ourselves somewhere amidst this world of chaos. We will go to great heights and great depths for this little piece of knowledge. We will sacrifice much and endure much, all for one thing: an identity.
A personality enables us to love ourselves. We learn not to care so much about what others think, say, and do. An identity encourages trust, strengthens beliefs, builds independence, and helps us find happiness. Discovering our special uniqueness enables us to let go of our past, allowing us the freedom to be the person we were made to be. When our identity is found, so are our talents. Not having singularity can lead to a life of regret and despair. This is why the mission to find our identity needs to be of high priority. This is why we risk so much to figure out who we are.
The trek we take is filled with questions.Where is my life going? Why do I feel so alone? Why am I even here? This adventure is full of doubts. Nobody likes me. I don’t fit in. I’ll never be able to do anything right. This crusade is full of drama. One second you two are best friends, the next archenemies.
During our journey, snares and grenades in the form of teasing remarks, embarrassment, and loneliness are thrown our way. We are brought down and made to feel worthless. But, we keep searching. Our self-confidence is stomped on. But, we keep searching. Hurt and betrayal slap us in the face. But, we keep searching. And, somewhere in the middle of all of this pandemonium, puzzlement, and pain, we come to the realization that it doesn’t matter who we are, but rather, who Christ is in us. We realize that it doesn’t matter what we do in life, but what Christ does through us. And, that it doesn’t matter what our identity in this world is, but what our identity in Christ is.
Henry Nouwen puts it this way, "My dark side says, I am no good... I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the "Beloved." Being the Beloved constitutes the core truth of our existence."
When we give Christ the command over our life, He dwells in us and us in Him. We are one with Christ. This means that we can do anything through Christ. We have the power to be whoever we want to be. We have the strength to do whatever we want to do. We have the courage to stand firm in our faith.
With our faith, we trust God to take care of us. We trust God when He says that He has a purpose for our lives, because He does. With our new identity, God has a specific purpose destined for us that surpasses all of our greatest dreams. With purpose in our life, we no longer feel useless. With purpose in our life, we know that we are worthy because our God is a worthy God.
I have taken this journey. There has been a point in my life where I felt that I deserved to not be loved and I would never amount to anything. I felt alone, hurt, inferior. Words cannot describe how dark my life was during this time. On the outside, I appeared to thrive. I smiled, laughed and pretended everything was okay. But on the inside, I was drowning and screaming for somebody to help me, show me that I was special and that I belonged. I searched to find this sense of peace. In every book, every song, every movie, every friend. When I was at the peak of despair, I felt like I never really would be wanted, needed, remembered. That was when I finally looked to God for the answer.
And, He wrapped me in His arms and said to me, “Because you are born again, you have righteousness with Me. This is your identity! I promise you that you are blessed at all times. This is your identity. You are my masterpiece, my most beautiful and finest creation. This is your identity. You are a daughter of Me, a perfect God. This is your identity. This is who you are. This is who I created you to be!”
So as I stand here today, I ask this one last question: Who am I? I am a child of God.