A Letter Written, To My Express Annoyance | Teen Ink

A Letter Written, To My Express Annoyance

October 2, 2009
By writersheart DIAMOND, B., California
writersheart DIAMOND, B., California
50 articles 0 photos 7 comments

A note that, after careful observance, a.) wearing your heart on your sleeve is entirely over rated, which can be translated into b.) cannot keep her fat foot out of her even bigger mouth. Though the advice given might not have been the best because c.) extreme paranoia and d.) look what she married. However, the reasons of which do not particularly matter because e.) that's just the type of person I am. Deal.

Plus, one is sufficiently cooled down enough so that, say, the entire email would not consist of "WHAT IS YOUR FREAKING PROBLEM?!?!" However crude, it is rather effective.

So here is my heart on my sleeve: after a mind rackingly dull four days or so, I have come to take as fact f.) it is incredibly fun to text Jessica until one o'clock in the morning g.) Tanya sucks at texting h.) Tiger, Tiger is not as pathetic as I first thought and i.) Janine is a very nice person. Oh, right, and the afore mentioned j.) a mannerism that seems to me extremely annoying, but also rather recent, so it might be assumed that a catalyst is involved. But, after a while, you can see that the catalyst was,
in fact, removed.

All of the above (f.g.h.i.) shows that, not only are my supposed friends incredibly busy, but they do enjoy my company, or, at least, protest the lack thereof. Which leads me to believe that there is nothing wrong with me in the first place. I quote, "SHOCKER."

But, thus saying, if there is nothing wrong with me, then what is wrong? A question I have failed to answer this past week, but has now been answered by (c.d.) Again the quote "[FORGET] IT ALL!" which leads us back to (a.b.) The point saying k.) I'm absolutely exhausted of being so nice.

Point l.) I am very nice m.) no I'm not n.) just keep telling yourself that, leads us all the way to point q. But we'll ignore n-q for the sake of time.

r.) The mannerism, which I have mention before, is indeed so annoying and blood curdling that I don't think my pillows will ever retain the same shape again. Which isn't as sad as you might be lead to believe, because they're Hawaiian themed, but the point is there(r.). s.) The arrogance of a fool leads to his untimely demise (hubris, so said) and often results in bloody screaming cyclops running down Mount Olympus. Athena got quite fed up with the whole deal. t.) A god-like countenance is not considered likeable in one so mortal. u.) Why should one waste the bunnies on Michelle? Forget the camels, they have solid gold bathtubs with pearl inlay! Do you know how much pearl inlay costs now a days? More than our grants from the government, I can tell you that.

The resulting solution is as follows v.) when people start to act like bumbling idiots, it's permissible that you scream and kick and shout and send your bunny rabbits after them instead of your arch nemesis. w.) The only way to get the (v.) result with out the bunny rabbits (which are sadly expensive and the tracker in Lester is not working, nor is Bruce cooperating and making you dress up like a giant carrot) is to x.) ignore them entirely.

Good Day.

The author's comments:
This is a letter I wrote to one of my friends, after he didn't email me for a very long time, even though he promised he would. I feel it is incredibly funny, especially since he had no idea what it was saying.

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This article has 10 comments.

Mystiecub said...
on Jun. 29 2011 at 7:12 pm


this had me laughing so hard, wish i had creativity like that when annoyed with a friend xD

on Dec. 26 2010 at 3:48 pm
sabina22 BRONZE, Glen Mills, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 47 comments
Haha this is amazing, I love it! When I get irritated with people I tend to write letters to them and some of them are similar to yours, haha =) I LOVE the last paragraph hahahahaha, especially cuz my school did a musical with a number called "Don't Be the Bunny" in it (long story) and this brought back really hilarious memories for me. Keep up the good work! =)

livie78 said...
on May. 18 2010 at 4:50 pm
This was awesome! I just went through a similar experience with my friends! Very well written!

on Mar. 15 2010 at 8:25 pm
writersheart DIAMOND, B., California
50 articles 0 photos 7 comments
yes. he did email back. he was confused. it was epic.

Venus_Queen said...
on Mar. 15 2010 at 5:02 pm
Dang!! did he ever E-Mail ya back?? i hope so, because you seem like a nice person to take the time out to put this up!! :)

ZacBookPro said...
on Nov. 12 2009 at 9:30 pm
Wow. That was pretty great! Who did you write this to? You must've been pretty irritated with him!

on Oct. 30 2009 at 11:16 am
t1g3rl1ly BRONZE, Franklin, Maine
1 article 0 photos 15 comments
This is amazing, to say the least! **Favorited**

on Oct. 19 2009 at 7:57 pm
tennisislovee34 GOLD, Sterling Heights, Michigan
15 articles 3 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every moment of your life, you're writing. Even in your dreams, you're writing. When you walk the halls in this school you meet various people and you write furiously in your head." -Frank McCourt

this is really funnny! :)

on Oct. 14 2009 at 6:51 pm
writersheart DIAMOND, B., California
50 articles 0 photos 7 comments
haha, no it did have a point. there were a lot of inside jokes that I put in. such as the camel/bunny religion I made up with my friend as a joke. but, yes, and once they reply back, 'um...what?' it makes you feel great.

Chloe S. said...
on Oct. 14 2009 at 4:39 pm
That is freakin' hilarious!!!! Was it completely random or did you have an actual point? Either way, something I might like to try in order to pass the time. (;