We’ve all heard the talk in the hallways about the kids who wear their hair in their face, who wear dark make-up or even dark clothes, “what are you emo?” Emo; what kind of word is that? A word – to kids – that means a person who cut themselves and are into screamo music. Wow, what a stereotype to make! Emo is the word kids use to describe victims of self-harm. I was a victim, and I’ve dealt with the name calling and the evil glares students once gave me. There are certain feelings victims get, and being teased for it pushes the feelings deeper and deeper inside of you; those feelings get trapped. Being a victim of self-harm before, I understand the pain victims feel and how it is to be teased in school for such a serious issue. It’s like nobody can ever relate to the feelings these people feel; or can they?

Have you ever felt lost you have no idea what to do or who to turn to? As a victim of self-harm, this feeling comes naturally. People think that they can judge a book by its cover; if you look happy, you have a perfect life. However, that isn’t always the case. I, for one, always had a smile plastered on my face; I never let people see the sadness that once consumed me. Sometimes you just get lost; you have no idea what to do. It’s like blowing up a balloon and then releasing it. You are so inflated with rage that you believe cutting will let everything seep out of you. Nobody will ever know what goes on inside of a person’s head. That personal can be entirely happy, sad, crazy or just content with everything going on; there’s no way to know for sure. Victims get teased for seeking attention or even sympathy. However, if people knew the truth, they wouldn’t make such accusations.

Do you think that people cut themselves for attention; to get people to feel bad for them? Don’t think that. Self-harm is a way of releasing ones anger, not to show off just to get teased even more. People make jokes, such as “ha you’re emo” or “can I get you a knife?” which makes every situation worse. How would you like it if you were going through something terrible, and instead of receiving help all you got was criticism? Not many people know that self-harm doesn’t get fixed with a snap of your fingers. It’s a disorder that takes time and patience and acceptance by the victim themselves. Believe me, it took me awhile to finally accept that I had a problem and I was dealing with it the wrong way; I just needed someone to talk to. Thankfully, I got it. However, not many people are as fortunate to get the help they need. Some parents don’t care about the problems that consume their child; they just want their child normal. But who said a victim wasn’t normal? Victims, such as me, are very good at masking their emotions. That is how everything starts, and how everything ends.

Everyone, no matter if you’re a victim of self-harm, needs to be heard. Everyone has feelings and sometimes some are so bottled up inside they need to be let out. I know what it feels like, you’re not alone. I know how it feels when something horrible happens and nobody cares to listen because it’s not about them. I know how it feels when you feel so alone and nobody is there to feel that void inside. I know how it feels to feel hopeless, insecure and scared. But you are not alone, trust me. There is someone out there who will listen to you and care about what you have to say. Express how you feel and don’t keep it bottled up inside. By keeping your emotions bottled up, you’ll end up like a balloon that ends up being popped instead of released; and that’s worse. Relax, and know that there are people there for you waiting to hear your story.

Being a survivor of self-harm, here is my advice: take it one step at a time. There is no problem that can’t be fixed. If you’re getting bullied at school, ignore it and walk away or talk to your guidance counselor. Bullying, along with self-harm, is a very serious issue and should be dealt with immediately. If you are having trouble at home, talk to your guidance counselor. They will give you the advice you need and the solutions you can do to make your lives better. Coming from me, self-harm is not the way to go. Not only can it scar your life, it can scar you. You will feel self-conscious about showing your arms; wondering if people are looking at your scars. Instead of having to worry about that, just don’t do it. There are other things you can do. Trust me.

Ideas you can do to relieve stress and other feelings instead of self-harm: write poetry, start a journal, write your problems on a piece of paper then tear it to shreds and throw it away. There are so many alternate solutions that don’t involve scarring your life and you mentally. You have to have the mindset that you are better than that and that you won’t do down to that level.

Lastly, stay strong. I understand what you’re going through and so does someone near you; you just have to find that person. Don’t give up! Do you want to wake up every day seeing dark scars on your arm? No! Gather all of your feelings, and let them out to someone because they are always here to listen to what you have to say. Do you think you’re worthless, or stupid, or just a plain screw-up? Think again. Trust me when I tell you that you are above everything. Never result to self-harm, because it can ruin how you see yourself, because I don’t see myself the same way I did years ago.

Remember: if you have any concerns, need someone to talk to or help with self-harm, there are multiple hotlines for you to call and most of them are toll free. Someone is always here for you. Don’t ever assume that nobody wants to listen; I know that feeling. You will NEVER be a balloon that is ready to pop. You will NEVER be a blown up balloon getting ready to be released. You will be YOU.

It will always start with you; and end with you. Stay strong.