Fitting In | Teen Ink

Fitting In MAG

By MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I wouldn't ask for a dressing room. My mom always asked for me.
The evening before I had repeatedly risen from my seat and piled on excess noodles suffocated in meat sauce. Then I licked my bowl with the buttered garlic bread, leaving no evidence of the four servings I had inhaled. In the morning I would be forced to lie on my bed and suck in my stomach just to button my jeans. I dreaded school shopping. The sale rack, with its slender size markers, knew my number continued to bloat.

I learned how to eat from my dad: fast and without thinking. In our house, the dinner table involved battle, with the children on defense. One false move and our dinner would be snatched off our plates without warning and gobbled up by our father faster than we could blink. We soon learned to keep a hand up while devouring our chicken strips, and if Mom decided to cook that night we needed to hurry and get seconds before it was gone.

Only one pair of jeans I tried on fit. I lied and told my mother I could button every pair but only needed the jeans that lay guarded in my hands. We walked to the checkout.

I kept my head down as we passed a group of girls. They whispered. I glanced up only long enough to know my place. Their eyes cut at me, hands cupped over their mouths in secrecy.

***

The recess bell rang and I followed two girls in my third grade class out past the monkey bars to the fenced grassy area. We all wore the same clothes that year: khaki pants and polo shirts. Everyone was the same, or that was the idea.

“I like your pants. Where did you get them?” Marcy asked Alicia. I nodded in agreement, thankful they had removed their cupped hands and I could hear the conversation.

“Really? I like yours better,” Alicia replied.

“We should trade. What size are you?” Marcy asked.

“I don't know …” Alicia said, finding the tag in the back of her pants. “Seven.”

“Me too,” Marcy said.

***

I hid in line as I held the jeans, tag folded in so nobody could see the number inscribed on it was 12. I am not a size seven.



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This article has 349 comments.


on Jul. 22 2011 at 7:04 pm
Angie.Hudak GOLD, Doylestown, Pennsylvania
10 articles 0 photos 42 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Hope for the best, expect the worst.&quot;<br /> &quot;One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.&quot; -Bob Marley

I beyond love this story! I'm with yoitsme, I'm natually skinny. But I wasn't always. I used to be extremely over weight, but as I grew up, I thinned out a lot. I went from like a size 14 to 00.

on Jul. 22 2011 at 4:38 am
KristinHopkins8 SILVER, Aspen, Colorado
7 articles 0 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die&quot;

that is a great story, really makes you sit and wonder....

on Jul. 11 2011 at 1:16 pm
WickedStarcatcher DIAMOND, Massapequa, New York
67 articles 1 photo 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I don&#039;t damsel well. Distress, I can do. Damseling? Not so much.&quot; <br /> &mdash; James Patterson<br /> &quot;This is the very first page, not where the storyline ends, my thoughts will echo your name until I see you again...&quot; ~Taylor Swift &quot;Enchanted&quot;

I really liked this! I think that everyone feels left out at some point in time-no matter how skinny they are or what size their jeans may be! This is so relateable and well written! :)

on Jul. 3 2011 at 5:35 am
Autumn-Rain SILVER, West Lafayette, Indiana
9 articles 1 photo 74 comments
This is great! I love it! I'm a naturally very skinny girl so I don't have a lot of issue with that. But you gave it so much feeling that I felt like it had happened to me.

on Jun. 30 2011 at 6:47 pm
towritelove37 GOLD, Kewanna, Indiana
16 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
You can&#039;t always get what you want...

You have such talent! Truly beautiful! Stay strong. and know that you are na amzing writer. Keep writing!!!

M-star BRONZE said...
on Jun. 30 2011 at 12:22 pm
M-star BRONZE, Kalamazoo, Michigan
4 articles 3 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Won&#039;t you come into the garden? I would like my roses to see you.&quot;- Richard Brinsley Sheridan

This is really good! I bet every girl has to go through something like this. It's no big deal!:)

EkeBont BRONZE said...
on Jun. 30 2011 at 6:25 am
EkeBont BRONZE, Glasgow, Other
4 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Aww, this is so sweet but sad. Great job. Really helped you imagine the feelings of the character and stuff. And I agree with the comment by "G_R_A_C_I_E" about the title, very creative ;) x

on Jun. 30 2011 at 12:24 am
G_R_A_C_I_E GOLD, Colonial Heights, Virginia
15 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;We are where we are, but we choose where we go.&quot; ~Anonymous

I feel ya. Great work! I also love the title fitting in. like fitting into pants. good work!

Graysay48 said...
on Jun. 9 2011 at 8:32 pm
Graysay48, South Berwick, Maine
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
onfusion never stops<br /> Closing walls and ticking clocks<br /> Gonna, come back and take you home<br /> I could not stop that you now know

This removes the cliche view on heavier people. Everyone has a story. It's not always their "stupid, lazy...." If everyone had to go through emotional trama like the horrid family situation described in this, everyone would be overweight.....

on Jun. 8 2011 at 8:22 pm
rubyrainstorm SILVER, Closter, New Jersey
7 articles 0 photos 275 comments

Favorite Quote:
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.<br /> -Buddha.

This story is amazing. Its so heartbreaking about how girls make hurtful comments all the time, without even noticing it. Loved this piece. Also, if anybody has time, please check out and comment my poem, The Girl Inside. Thanks!

jonasqueen said...
on Jun. 8 2011 at 6:50 pm
Really good story... plus very true for a lot of people even if it doesn't have to do with being a little over weight it can be anything that "doesn't look good"

on Jun. 8 2011 at 2:23 pm
R5andParamore BRONZE, Manalapan, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 67 comments
I just have big hips and i'm short. (p.s)

on Jun. 8 2011 at 2:23 pm
R5andParamore BRONZE, Manalapan, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 67 comments
Same. I wear a size 14 jeans and i'm not obese.

on Jun. 4 2011 at 8:29 am
bookwormjunkie, Dallas, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
WHAT THE HECK?!?!?!?!?!<br /> or<br /> EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Y'NOW?u cant always "JUST STOP BEING OBESE"its a life changing jounory that is VERY emotional. i mean u cant "NOT LET YOURSELF BECOME OBESE" ! seriously!!stuff happens and the mind does NOT work like that!!

on May. 25 2011 at 2:02 pm
amberw25 BRONZE, Duncan, Oklahoma
4 articles 5 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control at times and hard to handle. But if you can&#039;t handle me at my worst, then you don&#039;t deserve me at my best.<br /> - Marilyn Monroe

Good Job. Sorry you have to go through that. The key to a happy life though is loving yourself. Once you love yourself others will learn to love you too. Keep your head held high and don't let anyone bring you down.  Size 12 or Size 7 it doesn't matter because you will still be beautiful.  We are all creations of God and are beautiful because of him.  Allow people to look at your heart not your weight or pant size then they will know the real you. When you look in the mirror say 'I am beautiful no matter what other girls say.' Eventually your heart will show you how beautiful you are. Stay yourself, and don't change to please anyone. Be you! (:

FYITY said...
on May. 19 2011 at 4:06 am
did i direct that to her specifically?

on May. 17 2011 at 8:04 pm
FatesMistake13, Springerville, Arizona
0 articles 0 photos 157 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one&#039;s mistakes.&quot; Oscar Wilde <br /> <br /> &quot;The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame.&quot;

i am like shocked at how many people say that they are treated like that. My town and school must be very friendly cause though once a year a kid may be seriously made fun of it doesnt happen often and it usually ends in a fight and the peolple that fought become best friends. =) i love my town ....i am real sorry for what has happened to everyone

on May. 17 2011 at 2:38 pm
tikapeek97 BRONZE, Waterboro, Maine
2 articles 1 photo 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;good things come in small packages&quot; =)

Really good. I think a lot of people can relate to this story. Just rember it is not about how you look it is about how you feel about your self. If you are happy about the way you look then no one can tell you different.

casper said...
on May. 17 2011 at 1:27 pm

just because she's a size twelve does not mean that she will become obese. I'm a size 14 and I ain't obese.

Keep strong Sagechime. No matter what size you are, it's just a number, not who you really are.


FYITY said...
on May. 17 2011 at 5:56 am
I can't say that this wasn't well written; it can certainly 'relate' to many people out there, and part of your message was pretty encouraging, but the way some have interpreted it, I think was wrong. Of course, love yourself first, but if you truly love yourself, you will not let yourself become obese, you will not shorten your life span, you just also won't stoop to becoming bulimic to lose some.