I'm not sure who I am, im a mix of 2 people with completely different lives and views. One likes going on midnight walks while one is scared of the dark. One wants to go outside and play all day while one wants to stay home and watch TV. It feels like I have a personality disorder sometimes. I want to eat but don't want to gain weight. I want to succeed but don't want to do work. I want a social life but am scared of social interaction. It's impossible to chose between 2 choices with completely different outcomes. One bad one good, one fun one boring, one lively one deadly. everything has an outcome that we predict but do not know. We are indecisive. We don't know what we want, we think we have everything planed but nothing is planed. its random chance, random choice.