I have a piece of advice for the snowflakes. First, before you judge others, think of their story; and here is mine.

In 5th grade, my family made a breakthrough. It was the most welcoming change I experienced, although it came with unexpected consequences.

We moved houses. From the terrible rental that I spent my elementary years growing up in, into an even more crowded space.

The difference between the houses was enormous. My old home was infested with bugs of all kinds, frightening cockroaches, scorpions, ants, spiders, and filled with dirt and grime from years of living. Being a low-income family, you can’t afford the simplest things; even privacy, so even then my family was put into somewhat tight spaces. My childhood mind could never understand that being in that situation wasn’t exactly normal. I didn’t know people experienced life differently; or had a variety of dinner foods, and not just boiled, packaged ramen noodles.

We moved into another home - a fresh start - and managed to keep the bugs out. No longer worried about them crawling onto us in our sleep, it felt good. To be safe from the nasty creatures that roamed the night, desperate to get into a warm environment littered with “food”. 

I have a large family, as so many poverty-stricken people do.  I am the youngest out of all of them; and imagine, before It must have been much worse. I have four full siblings and four half-siblings, though two of them I consider to be full blood. Resources are spread thin, most of my older siblings earn only minimum wage, and even then we have more additions to the family. I have two young nieces, two family dogs excluding the dozen or so my father has. 

My mother has done her best with what playing-cards she had been given in life. She has always been fighting for us, her childrens’ futures, and nowadays takes care of us when she can. Even while fighting her own demons that come out from family-friend deaths,  passing of our dogs, or struggles with her spine which has thinned in a part, and erupts in sharp pains whenever it is pushed too far. 

I have two siblings with chronic health conditions. One of them has never gotten above 100 pounds, the other is slowly losing weight since the day they were diagnosed. They both have been in-and-out of hospitals for years with early kidney failure, symptoms from deficiencies, blockages in their stomach, or even from the flu. They have gotten a thread close to death; with covid, our lives have become strict, harder from the “what ifs”. 

I even experience confusing inner-battles over my disabled-father, whom I barely remember taking care of me as I grew up. 

Even today, I have hard day-to-day challenges. It is harder than you think to watch your older siblings, the ones you thought would be around forever, go through hardships that you cannot help with. Online school, too, is harder in this situation. 

Such a good breakthrough shouldn’t have had consequences, for new middle-schooler me, I was presented with another problem. Bullying.

I did not attend the same middle school as all of my friends in elementary school. It began then, with the terrible loneliness and empty-shallow state of mind. Numbness. This was caused by being alone for so long in an environment full of potential friends but yet passed by without a second thought if alone.

It was first my clothing. My mother does her best, and provides at least new pairs of clothing every year or so. I had gotten into a habit of getting items that were much bigger than needed; to have space to grow into in the new year. Here the bullying started. Snarky comments from the popular, funny kids in the back that always held up in the class and the unmentionable murmurs from crowds with judging stares. It was a continuous thing from different groups of people; strangers, classmates, girls, boys, the funny, the popular, the pretty. Then it went to physical appearance, weight, my relationships, and even my sexuality was questioned. 

Even at a point, the last year of middle school, I had realized how deceitful my “friends” actually were; as even they had gone behind my back and called names for me doing things necessary for the health of my being. 

It felt like heartbreak, almost, to have realized no one had your back - not even those you had spent the last three years with. Rumors sparked, and seemly spread like wildfire. 

This almost followed me into high school. I found myself and even friends threatened with rumors; those same in middle school, to be told in high school. To prevent people from knowing the good in my soul, or the good in those I hung out with. 

I am now called what is nowadays called a snowflake. 

A snowflake is what people refer to as people that are broken down; entirely against violence, arguments, name-calling, and judging others before knowing them. Snowflakes see the good in people and get hurt for it.  They are too nice, not blunt enough, and care too much about others and not enough about themselves. Snowflakes don’t do well with pressure, tend to overthink, and are quite worried about living up to expectations. Snowflakes put on masks; they don’t often show their negative emotions to loved ones, much less strangers. Even then, they are often silent, though silence speaks words. They don’t do well with judgment from their peers, are self-conscious in a crowd, struggle with social anxiety, and strongly dislike others that name-call before understanding someone else's story. They don’t message first, start conversations, or phone calls; they fear bothering the few that genuinely care. They have small friend groups - or in my case, no true friends in quarantine. They check up on others and value their state of mind, but cannot bring themselves to free up time to check up on themselves. They seem to never have a permanent friend. They feel drained from toxic name-calling, to the point they don’t feel like themselves, but put up with it often without fighting back for the sake of not hurting someone the way they had been in the past. The only reasoning for that is that a negative times a negative isn’t positive; life is not math class. 

I am proud to say this didn’t break me. Life didn’t break me, and It won’t in the future.

Snowfall is quite a beautiful reaction to the freezing temperatures. 

Snow can be resilient. No matter how many times you scrape the pavement, and rid snow off the sidewalks, snow always builds up again. Snow is pure. White, soft, fluffy almost. So many creative projects can be made. Snow can fall in the form of a blizzard; heavy, entrapping, dangerously cold, violent. But unlike others, snow does not leave as much drastic environmental destruction. 

So here is my advice for my fellow snowflakes. 

Put yourself at a high priority. People come and go; you have yourself for life so treat yourself. Stay healthy; eat your recommended calories, stay fit, take vitamins. Dress how you want; pay little attention to those who stare, or talk, for they have no influence unless you allow them to. Get an education, prepare yourself for the future and fight for yourself. No one will fight for you as well as you will. Get a job, get yourself to a high point in life with a stable income, and achieve your goals. 

Those who love you, and are loyal to you, will understand your strive for greatness. They will understand your desire to better yourself, your situation, and will even be there for your return for advice, help, or to let loose. Love them back, without letting others interfere, and be light, positive, resilient, and have integrity. Be better than the bullies.

One day you’ll have wings that can spread wider than those who have attempted to bring you down with them. You’ll find success when you strive, prepare, and work for it. 

The bullies will have quite a shock when they see your happiness and your success. They will see how they failed to discourage someone - how pointless it was, and others struggling with bullying will be inspired to make a change.

So now, fellow snowflakes; if you are reading this, this is your sign. Start striving.