“I am loud but only to hide the fact that I am boring.
I wear make-up but think I’m ugly.
I hate drama but I often start it.
I am a teenage girl.
I don’t have a group of friends that are ‘mine’.
I can’t seem to find my place.
I always sit at the popular table but rarely enjoy myself.
I am a teenage girl.
I smile when someone says I’m pretty but I never believe them.
I shrug it off when someone makes fun of me, but only ‘cause I know they’re joking.
I try my hardest but only so no one can laugh at me when I fail.
I. Am. A. Teenage. Girl.” I spoke the last words off my paper and looked up to the classroom of wide eyes and open mouths.
No one spoke, because no one knew what to say.
All my friends shrank down in their seats and the teacher shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Finally she cleared her throat and spoke. “Thank you, that was very nice. You may take your seat now.”
I obeyed immediately because the second I had uttered my last words I realized writing that for the poetry project had been a mistake.
Even as I rushed to my seat, I felt their questioning eyes on me—wondering: Why would she do something like that? Those are sorts of things we only think, never say.
And it was true I don’t know why I had done it.
I had never been the one to question the rules, just to fallow them.
I knew in that moment that no one would every talk to me again. I was sure of it, so you can imagine my surprise when someone started clapping.
I looked up, as everyone else did, to the girl in the first row who had now stood. She stopped clapping and looked like she might cry, so she took a deep breath and then she spoke,
“I don’t like my boyfriend but you all seem to so I keep him around.
I never admit it when someone hurts my feelings because I know it doesn’t matter to them.
I spend more time in front of the mirror then I do with my family, and I hate that about myself.
I am a teenage girl.”
There was nothing but silence as a tear fell from her eye and onto her cheek.
Her eyes meet mine and it looked like she was realizing as well, that speaking words as such was not a good idea, but then another girl stood and spoke the forbidden words.
Hers were shorter but only on account of fear.
“I hate my friends but everyone else likes them so I suck it up and tell myself I’m lucky.
I am a teenage girl.”
Then another girl, and another and so on until the boys, the teacher and I were the only ones left seated.
But soon I stood too. Could it really be that I wasn't as alone as I had thought?