I have been close to my cousin all my life. Born two months apart to two very close siblings. But sometimes our closeness pushed us apart.

Children follow in their parents footsteps.I have always shadowed my mom in many ways,I inherited her strong personality sense of leadership and full lips. My cousin took on her fathers looks and his idiosyncrasies, but she had her mothers jealous spirit.

I am told stories of copied actions and choices, of times when my Aunt bought a white sweater because my uncle liked how it looked on his sister.Even though I had heard these stories I never truly believed them. I continued on with this naive nature for a while, not believing in the monster of envy that was hiding under my bed.

When I turned seven, I had decided to get baptized.(To fulfill the congregations idea of Helen’s sweet baby granddaughter- the golden girl.) I had told my cousin that it would be taking place on sunday,I wanted her to come.That wednesday my mom told me that she had just been baptized and that we missed it.She had missed mine to.

Over the next few years,things like that started to stack up and that naive seven year old could no longer pull up the covers and let envy live on the backside of her mattress. That little girl had to face the fact that envy wasn’t a hairy green monster --

It was her cousin.