As is the case with many teenagers at some point in their lives, there was a time when I wasn’t feeling very good about myself. I would overthink everything I said and did. I couldn't do anything without suffering some kind of criticism from myself. I turned to music as a source of solace from my mind, presenting a break from hearing my thoughts. I happened to stumble upon a song called “Be Kind to Yourself” by Andrew Peterson.

I listened to the song, and while I’m not usually the kind of person that gets wrapped up in the lyrics, one line stood out boldly to me: “How does it end when the war that you’re in is just you against you against you?” 

This made me sit down and think for a little while. I had never felt so seen by a song before. I hadn’t been aware of the attacks I was throwing at myself; I thought I was just raising my standards for myself. This single lyric made me physically stop and reanalyse the way I spoke to myself. 

  I like how this phrase is posed as a question because I tried to think of a way there could be a positive outcome; but in reality, there’s no way one can succeed if all they do is repeatedly drag themselves down. I realized I was putting myself into a war against myself, one without any benefit to me or my mental state. From this new perspective, I tried to be less critical and more accepting of myself. 

There has been a notable change in my life since I have enacted this mindset. I don’t beat myself up for things that aren’t in my control. It has made me more forgiving of myself when I make mistakes, made me realize that I hold myself to higher standards than the people around me. I try to forgive myself as easily as I forgive others. Whenever I feel myself straying from this ideology, I give the song another listen, let those words wash over me, and give the situation a look with a fresh pair of eyes.