What does it mean to “grow”? Is it becoming wiser? Is there a formula? Is it the goal of every human being? What are the outcomes of “growing” anyway? To boil it all down, I think it raises the potential for our overall well-being. We’re able to overcome internal struggle, not rely on instant gratifications, find a meaningful life for ourselves, and be true and comfortable with ourselves and others. I have this life with this constant conscienceness, and the truth is I have no idea as to why. But this is what I have now, and I can utilize it and make the most out of it.

So how do we grow? I don’t believe there is a set path for each individual because every one of us has our own unique journey. Although I do believe we can set the right circumstances that enable and allow growth. It think it requires truthfulness to the self to begin with. As Ken Wilbur put it, “When you’re untruthful about parts of yourself, those parts show up as symptoms, as narosis, as pain, as anxiety, as depression. Because you violated that validity claim, you’re not being truthful about your own heart.” You’re not being your authentic self, which I think leads to self denial and the symptoms Ken Wilbur explained. If you’re not being true to yourself and are trying to please others, how will you ever learn how to please yourself?

Since everyone has a different journey, the underlying key to growth requires setting up the right circumstances for it. For instance, if you spend your time constantly immersed in television, video games, shopping, ect. where would you find time for self-analysing and becoming more aware of yourself as a whole? And we’re talking about things as vital as defining your values, dreams, goals, and what you want to get out of your life... this is building your identity. What kind of circumstances can we set up for ourselves to this growth? I’d say the best ways are journaling, reading, talking, learning from your mistakes, and experiencing new things. How can we ever really discover and find ourselves without allowing us the opportunities to do so?