Growing up I was always laughing and smiling. I never let anything get me down; bullies, criticism, arguments, they didn’t stand a chance. Some would even say I showed excessive happiness. Well, that was all about to change. Life decided to throw some hardships at me. After beating all of those, there was one that would be everlasting; depression.

Who knew that one little word could have such a big meaning? Depression is the feeling of intense sadness. It causes feelings of being helpless, hopeless, and worthless. It can last from days, weeks, to even years. It keeps you from functioning normally.

Depression has caused me to put my life on hold at times. I didn’t want to be around my friends, or family. I couldn’t enjoy the little things anymore, no matter how hard I tried. School was too hard to bear, and that is when home schooling began. I became physically and emotionally exhausted. Thoughts of suicide often popped into my mind. There were even days when crying seemed like my only option.
Looking over my essay, I realize that I have written most of it in past tense. To be honest, not much has changed with my depression. I still have a hard time enjoying the little things. I have grown so attached to home schooling, that I fear public school. I am still physically and emotionally exhausted, thoughts of suicide still pop up, and crying still seems like my only option.
Although not much has changed, I am willing to fight a little harder each day and find light in the darkest places. Treatment for depression is always an option. Whether it’s medicinal, spiritual or just trying to heal yourself, as long as you try!