When I was 8 years old I lost the person I loved the most. My Best Friend, the only person in the world I told everything to, the person I thought I would never lose, my Nana. I remember back to when I was little, living in a cozy apartment with my parents, my Nana, and my two dogs. I loved our family, I couldn't ask for anything better. My Nana had always been the person I looked up to, she was my favorite person to be around, I always wanted to be with Nana. I loved her more than words could describe.

In the begining, everything was perfect, I had everything I ever could have wished for. After a while I started to notice some things were changing. I noticed week after week my Nana's hair started to get really short and slim. I could also tell that she always seemed drained. I didn't think much of it and besides, what did I know? I was just a little kid. A couple weeks went by and everythign seemed okay. I went to my mom's to visit and when I came back it had all changed. I remember walking into the apartment and seeing my Nana in a hat, "A hat?" I thought. I asked her why she was wearing a hat in the house and that's when she dropped the bomb. She told me she had cancer. Myself being as little as I was, didn't think much of it. Little did I know, that conversation between the two of us would someday because life changing.

Awhile went by and some things were changing. My Family and I moved out of our apartment and moved to a different town. My Nana was still getting her treatment and she seemed to be doing okay. Every now and then our family had conversations about the Cancer, they never lasted very long. I was sometimes very grateful for that. I never wanted to talk about it. I figured we don't talk about it, we don't have to accept it. It was extremely difficult for all of us to accept it and realize this was really happening, this WAS real life. I look back to those days and really wish I had them back.

Later, things really started taking a turn for the worse. I started to notice the naps got longer, she got weaker, and at that point I had so much fear built up inside me I didn't know what to do. I never wanted to bring this up so I just left it alone. I could tell she was in pain, sometimes more than other times. One afternoon I decided to go outside and play with my freinds. All of a sudden I could see my Dad in our doorway screaming my name, he was crying, my dad never cries. At that moment I knew I needed to get help. I sprinted up the apartment stairs to my friend's apartment to get his Mom. I was so scared my hands were trembling and I could just about feel my heart jumping out of my chest. I was yelling outside of her apartment door "HELP! We need help!" She ran down to my apartment, shutting the door behind her. I had no clue what was going on. A million thoughts were rushing through my head all at once. The next thing I knew the parking lot was flooding with cop cars, ambulances, and fire trucks. When I saw my Nana being rolled out of the house on a stretcher, I lost it. I felt so empty inside. My dad got into the ambulance and left while I was to stay with my friend's Mom.

Later that night, after many questions, many phone calls, and many tears, I was finally aware of what was going on. My Nana had been washing a pot in the sink and all fo a sudden she fell and hit her head. She was immediated rushed to the hospital. Later that night I went to the hospital to see her and i was a wreck. What I saw was completely different from what I thought was going to happen. We sprinted to the room she was in and I went straight to talk to her and that's when my heart sank. She was unresponsive, she could hear us, but she couldn't respond. It broke my heart to see her struggling for words, trying so hard to talk to me. All I remember is telling her everything is going to be okay, I only wish those words would have been true. A couple days went by and nothing got better, things got worse. The doctors told us there was nothing they could do, it was too late. I remember my parents trying to explain everything that was going on, but everything I saw and  heard was a big blur. I just wanted everything to go back to the way it was before.

Finally, when the doctors were 100 percent sure there was nothing else they could do, we decided to take her home to be on home care, we all knew it was only a matter of time. The cancer had completely taken over her body. Even though she couldn't talk to me I knew she could listen. So, every night I would read to her, it gave me time to be with her and I read the books we always used to read together. The America Girl Doll books. I would sit in her room for hours with her and just read and talk. It reminded me of how things used to be and I think we both needed that. Aout a week or so went by and then the time finally came. I remember waking up at about 2 in the morning to go to the bathroom and I heard my parents screaming my name. I rushed into my Nana's room to find my parents on each side of the bed and my Nana struggling for air. I hashed to the side of her bed and was holding her hand as tight as I could saying "Don't let go, " but in the blink of an eye, she was gone. I felt as if my workd had just been completely tured upside down. In that moment a golden heart stopped beating and the world lost its best Nana. a couple days later was the funeral and we had family come in. Everyone was still mourning, the service was quiet and peacefil, just the way she would have wanted. I had lost the most important person in my life and there was no getting her back.

Here I am about 4 years later and I am still not over it, and I know I will never be and I have learned to accept that. She will always and forever be in my heart and she will always be with me through all obstacles I face in life. I know she will always be watching over me and guiding me through everything, she wall always be my guiding angel. I made a promise to myself that I would always love life for the both of us, and I plan to stock to it!

In Loving Memory of Evelyn J D.

"God saw Evelyn was getting tired and the cure was not to be, so he put his arms around her and whispered "come with me." With tearful eyes we watched her fade away, although we loved her dearly we could not make her stay. A golden heart stopped beating, hardworking hands to rest, God broke out hearts to prove he only takes the best."