I’ve been a cheerleader since seventh grade. When I first joined, it was to be with my friend. I was really shy, and cheerleading didn’t seem anything like something I would ever be interested in. The first few years were rough. I didn’t have the love for the sport like my friend did. I didn’t enjoy going to practices or the games, I was really only doing this to be with her. Looking back, I was probably one of the worst on our team. After that first football season, I didn’t go back for basketball. This, honestly, I regret so much. From seventh grade to my senior year of high school, this season is the only one I didn’t do.

When I started high school, my friends goal was to be on Varsity as a freshman. I didn’t care. JV was good enough for me, and I wasn’t good enough for Varsity. Like everything in my friends life, she accomplished what she set out to do. Basketball season, freshman year, she made the team. Me? Not a chance. I still didn’t care though. I didn’t care until she stopped texting me, talking to me in the hallway, or even looking at me. I felt like the last few years were wasted on a friend who chose the sport over me.

The next year, which was sophomore year, all of the other girls in my grade made Varsity. Me?  I was on JV with all of the freshmen. Because of this, I’ve never been more determined to do something in my life. I was embarrassed and confused. Why didn’t I make the team? Voted as captain, I was given the faith by my teammates that I was good enough. I made new friends, and I had fun at practice. But there was still nothing more I wanted than being on the Varsity team. I worked on tight motions, knowing all of the cheers, and my jumps transformed overnight.

When tryouts were just around the corner, I was ready. I made the team. When I saw the email with my name on the varsity list, a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. That season went on to be my favorite. We only lost two games, both to the same team, had buzzer-beater game winning shots, a great atmosphere, and it was the first time I wanted to be there.

Cheering for a Varsity football team is amazing.. JV just does not compare. There were bright lights and hundreds of people. There was talk about a competitive cheerleading team going on. No one knew if it was going to happen, but in the end, it did.

Now, I thought cheering at the Varsity football games were loud, scary and cheerful… Being at a cheer competition is really like nothing else. Our practices are long and hard, everyday of the week. We were new and didn’t know what we were doing, but we improved over the season. This was my junior year, so I knew I only had one more year left of cheering for my school. Our first comp season made that all seem okay. Practices were horrible, our coach was immature and mean, and the team had so much drama it was like watching reality television. I hated it. Being on the mat was the only thing I enjoyed. I worked my way up to front and center in Round 1, which I was very proud of. Over the past few years, my jumps have gotten quite good, so I think that’s why. I sometimes think that’s the only reason I’m in Round 1, but I think I’m just being too hard on myself. We put in so many hours everyday, but we still came in last at every competition. Oh, the friend I started to cheer with in seventh grade, she didn’t do competitive because one of her cheer friends wasn’t doing it because she was too good for us. The sideline coach once came to our comp practice and yelled at us, saying we weren’t a real sport, and that our new coach wasn’t the real Varsity Cheerleading coach, but it was her. She cried and yelled at us to give her her uniforms back. Which, those uniforms belong to the cheer program, not her. It was a big ordeal. Since then, anybody who did competition cheer instead of sideline cheer, was dead to her.

Now, it’s senior year. Football season was horrible; the worst season I’ve ever done. Everything was about the captains, which, of course, wasn’t me. There were only three seniors, yet there were two captains. I knew this was going to happen before there were even tryouts. This coach was still mad about so many of the girls choosing to do competition over sideline. She was so immature, and it was like she was apart of a clique with the other seniors. We all voted for captains at the second practice, before any of the new girls even got a chance to meet everyone. Since I was on JV with some of the younger girls, a lot of them liked me. A majority of the team was juniors, and I knew each and everyone. I felt confident in my abilities that I would be voted as a captain, but I just knew the other two seniors would be captains over me. And for my best friend from seventh grade? She was one of the captains. She tried to include me whenever they made “big decisions,” for the team, but if I came up with it, never did the coach like my idea. At the banquet, the two other seniors got the MVP award. The girls on my team were so kind, and they made a little sign out of a napkin that said, “You’re our MVP.” I was more proud to have that than anything my coach could have given me.

Soon that horrible season was over. It was bitter-sweet. I was sad to be leaving the friday night lights, but I was not sad about leaving my coach. I knew competition season was coming up, and I was hoping for the best. Which, so far it has been. We have four weeks left, and 5 competitions. As a senior, I’m getting a little more emotional at each comp. We struggle with some of the girls not giving it their all when we’re on the mat or at practice. My one hope for the team is that we can all come together and perform like a family.

Through the years of cheering, I’ve struggled with not feeling like I was good enough. I started out not even interested in the sport, and it turned into my life. I’ve had the opportunity to coach the middle school cheerleaders with my stunt group and volunteer at multiple events. My collection of bows is ever growing, and I don’t believe it’ll ever stop. I’m planning on coaching again next year, and hopefully I can work my way up to the varsity coach. I’ll always love cheerleading, no matter how much I complain about it now. It really is a lifestyle you have you want and work hard at, but what I got in return will always be worth it.