Chapter 1
(Chapter 1)
Harry pulled into the church parking lot where people, solemn, crying and dressed in black, stumbled toward the doors. He checked his hair in the mirror after he had parked and shut off the car before throwing on sunglasses and preceding into the smallish building. He reached the doors and was greeted with pictures of what he assumed to be Sarah. She was beautiful. Shoulder length blonde hair and side bangs. Blue and hazel eyes from what he could tell and condescending smile. He almost laughed at the way she looked into the camera next to her little brother ( he assumed).This girl was pretty too, but she wasn't Sarah. Sarah. The name stuck to his tongue and caught in his throat. He shook her smile form his head, well, he tried to but her soft eyes and judging smile stayed, pulling him deeper as he walked on through the posters and posters of her. It made him sick. He remembered why he hated Miami. The air conditioning made it too cold to think and made him chilled to the bone (this had made Harry sick to the stomach) and the outside was worse, so hot he couldn't help but swear everything was on fire. He shivered at the thought and it made him more nauseous than before. He took a seat in the back of church and picked up a document with some things about Sarah on it.
Sarah-Charlotte Brady was a bright girl with a cunning beauty and precious personality. Harry stopped reading. He didn't believe what they had said. She didn't seem like someone with a 'precious personality'. He refused to believe it. There was a girl with her in the picture on the back. The caption read 'Sarah-Charlotte and best friend, Marin Frances'. He hadn't noticed the girl until he saw her come down the makeshift aisle and sit down next to what Harry assumed to be Sarah's parents. The woman she sat next to started to pet her hair as Marin rested her head on the woman's shoulder. It was obvious they were comforting each other. The pastor stood up on the stage and started to sum up Sarah's life.
"When a child is taken from our arms, it's a tragedy, but when Sarah-Charlotte died, it hit home. She was everyone's friend and had the most beautiful personality. She loved her brother and her parents. She, like any other teenager wanted freedom." Harry smiled at that part.
"Sarah-Charlotte had said that she wanted two people to sum her up and since only one knew of her existence, I would like to invite her best friend, Marin, to come forward." Harry had a feeling that the second person may have been him, but he was never sure. The girl stepped on stage. He felt a wave of agony wash over him as her picture appeared on the screen behind the girl.
"Let me just say that Sarah, hated the name Charlotte so why you all are referring to her as such is beyond me." Half the crowd gasped and the other half snickered. She continued. "Hello. I'm Marin and I had the pleasure of being best friends forever to the girl of honor." She smiled and people chuckled. Harry smiled. "I had known Sarah since we were babies and as cliche as it sounds, she was my soulmate. I have never met anyone else like Sarah and sometimes it's hard to wrap my head around the fact that she's gone." Her voice cracked but she recovered and Harry involuntarily leaned forward, as if this would make him closer to Sarah. "Last year me and Sarah made videos because we were bored. I know. Me and Sarah. Bored?" She paused and smiled the crowd laughed slightly. "So we made these 'If I Die..' Videos and we thought they were jokes but here we are, about to watch Sarah's and it kills me. I never wanted to watch my second parents go through this. I never wanted to have to stand here and 'sum-up' Sarah's life. You can't sum up Sarah's anything. That's what was so great about Sarah. She was maze that had ever-evolving walls, so whenever you figured something out, it changed to become more advanced. Sarah was my best friend and I if I had the choice between selling my soul to the devil for just another minute with Sarah, I would. Sorry, Pastor." She paused to wipe a few tears away when Harry noticed she wasn't reading off of cards. She was winging it. Marin walked off stage as the video started. A pair of pink converse high tops could be seen running toward the camera till someone picked it up and said we're rolling.
"Hello everyone!" Sarah jumped onto the screen and smiled at the audience like she knew they would be watching. "Sarah here. Just wanted to say thanks for coming to my funeral. It means so much to me and my family." The camera shifted like someone was setting it on a tripod. "Everyone, this is my honorary sister, Marin. Isn't she just irresistible?" Sarah and Marin smiled as Sarah gave her friend a kiss on the cheek. Harry smiled and then felt sad. Sarah pushed Marin off of the screen and giggles could be heard on and off of the picture. "I have a few people to address. First of all, Jeremy Roberts. Baby, you and I will always be unfinished business." Sarah blew a kiss into the camera and laughter could be heard around the room. Even Harry laughed a bit. A kid a few rows in front of Harry blushed madly. "Next, Ruby Melville. I have nine words for you after this." Sarah paused dramatically. "Ooo, girl! I know what you did last summer!" She smiled and giggled again. "And third, Mom and Dad and Luke. Mostly Luke though for this next one. Smile more, judge. Trust me, the ladies will love it! And mom and dad, don't miss me too much, it'll make me sad to know I can't be there. And finally, to the love of my life, Harry Styles, I love you with all my heart. I wish I could have gotten to pull you over and give you a proper snog." Harry blushed and both girls laughed before Marin could be heard saying, in your dreams, Brady!
"And to the bestest person in the whole world, Marin. Please get married and have children and name them after me. And lay off the LSD, would ya? It's gonna kill you one day." everyone laughed at this even Marin, Harry was confused but figured Sarah had said this becuse it was so far from the truth. Marin, there was something about her but Harry couldn't grasp it as he continued to look at Sarah.
"Well, I guess this is goodbye." Sarah looked sad. "I love you all, so so much. Yes. Even you." Sarah pointed directly into the camera to kinda point to everyone. "Remember my life like a book. It's never really over as long as you keep talking behind my tombstone." She smiled but no one laughed at the joke. It was silent. "Adios, mi amours! Ti'amo! Je t'aime! I love you! Goodbye!" The camera was dropped and the sneakers ran off again, laughing. The funeral only lasted a few more minutes after that. Harry felt like with the pastors closing words, Sarah wasn't gone. She was there. He felt her presence. She was next to him.
The reception that followed, Harry went up to Sarah parents as they were sitting surrounded by friends, trying to cheer them up. Before Harry could reach them however, a person pulled him away and out of the room. He wasn't trying to fight back once he saw a flash of long red hair that could only be one girl. Suddenly he was brought back to the little bakery and the beautiful red head that he couldn't remember anymore. Sarah replaced her now, and this girl was no different. He couldn't remember her. He didn't remember her name but she had talked about Sarah. He didn't care about her name. Only about Sarah.
"What are you doing here?" She seethed at him. Harry was shocked. "I told them not to do it. Not to broadcast it. She wouldn't have wanted to be seen as the crazy directioner girl. She was just wearing the sweater, she didn't really feel that way. And now you're here. I can't believe you are so rude as to actually show up. She would have hated having your pity." Marin leaned against the wall, spent. She had fought so hard to try and make them see reason and they had seen her point, but it was too late. It was already out, because right in front of her was the one person she never wanted to hear about again. Harry Styles. To say Marin was a fan may have been an understatement. She was like any other half one direction girl, trying to hide it from her extremely judgmental friends. Then she realized that Sarah had the same half obsession and they fangirled and they were even closer if that's possible. And they both loved the idea of him and now that Sarah had died, Marin didn't want to see, hear, look at, or think about Harry Styles. Harry still stood there stunned. He recovered quickly though.
"Why are you even here?" Marin asked Harry, crossing her arms at him in frustration at his manners. Horrible manners. He remembered her now. She was Sarah's friend.
"I came to...God, I don't know, Marin. I don't even know." Harry ran his hands through his curls. He closed his eyes and all he could see was what he assumed to be Sarah sitting on a swing. It was a picture he saw while looking at the poster boards. She was at a lake. She was reading she looked happy. Harry remembered Sarah. Every detail of her face. Every thing about her, he knew (at least that's what it felt like). Marin got a crease between her eyebrows and cocked her head to the side.
"Well...it won't do any good to send you away now. Stay." Marin commanded him, running her hands through her hair. Harry sighed in response.
"Harry...are you okay?" Marin asked hesitantly. She didn't know if she had the right to ask if he was okay. She just yelled at him for attending her best friends funeral. Something Sarah definitely would have kissed him for. Harry shook out his hair before turning on Marin, pointing an accusing finger at her.
"Don't try to make me stay...or ask if I'm okay. I don't have the answer." Marin rolled her eyes at him and he tried to hide his smirk.
"Yeah. And midnight ain't no time for laughing when you say goodbye, right? Don't quote your own songs, Harry. Makes you seem like a insecure b****." Harry and Marin laughed. Then Marin stopped. She felt awful laughing with her best friends "husband" at her funeral and the more Marin thought about it, the more Marin wanted to cry. So Marin cried and cried. Until she couldn't bear to look at him anymore. Couldn't bear to see anything anymore. Everything reminded her of Sarah.
Harry felt a pang in his chest every time he let out a breath of air. No he wasn't dying, at least not physically. In each passing moment, Sarah consumed his every thought. She was like a poison in creme-brûlée. Sweet as it goes and then BAM! you're dead and you didn't even feel it coming. That's what it was like for Harry, even if he didn't know it. Sarah was going to control Harry. She was going to be his every thought and he would drown in her unearthly presence, the one he would make up. Sadly, these predictions were correct. Harry was gone the moment he saw the words, 'If I Die Today, Tell Harry Styles I Loved Him'.

Chapter 2
(Chapter 2)

Days passed. Sarah. Sarah. Sarah. That's all anyone ever thought about. Sometimes Harry would drive and subconsciously go to the place where a tiny white cross with the initials SCB engraved into the fresh pine wood. Harry would look at the cross and sometimes sit next to it and just watch the swaying trees and beach beyond. He never expected to see a beat up Corolla pull up next to his rental car. He never expected to see Marin look at him in utter annoyance. Harry never wanted to see the girl again, but he did. And she wasn't alone.
"Harry...this is my brother, Mitchell. I drove past here a couple nights ago and saw you and was wondering if you wanted to come to Sarah's grave sight with us..." Marin trailed off. Did she really want to do this? No, but Sarah would have liked it, she consoled herself with this thought. Harry was already in his car by the time she could even change her mind.
"You lead." He shouted through the window, sunglasses down on his head and Mitchell and Marin hopped back into Mitchell's car. Marin was jealous of the junk Mitchell had, car especially. She never had her own anything really. Hand-me-downs and beat up sneakers from Mitchell or Maia, their oldest sister. They never really saw Maia anymore. Marin and Mitchell never acknowledged why anymore, but they knew it was something to do with their parents. After Harry started following them they found themselves a fifth of a hundred minutes down the road, inside the gates of a simple cemetery. Harry immediately thought it shabby, but saw its elegance in simplicity soon after stepping out of his car. The walkway was paved and the grass was clean and cut, bright and cheery flowers lined the paths and the land looked small and quaint. Harry fell on love with it as much as you could ever fall in love with a place. This place reminded hi. Of how he pictured Sarah, small and quaint with simple beauty. Yes, Harry had decided, he loved Sarah and she loved him. She had said it. She loved him and he loved her. Sarry? Harah? He wasn't sure what their couple name would be but he knew she would love being loved.
Soon after they visited Sarah, Marin and Harry became inseparable. Always laughing and talking, mostly about Sarah. It was good for Marin to talk about how sad she was and all the fun adventures Sarah and Marin had experienced, but all it did for Harry was bring him down. It didn't make him sad, it just brought him deeper into the un solved mystery of Sarah. The girl with brown eyes and straight B's and hated working at the shoe store so settled on the library, something she got payed under the table for. Something she liked to spite her parents with. Her father owned the shoe store. Harry would laugh and sometimes even cry with Marin about Sarah, so when his two weeks of break were gone with the wind, Harry promised to call.
"Hello! Thanks for calling. I'm more than unlikely on a plane to some remote island with my Abercrombie model so leave a message and I'll get back to you if I like you." The laugh could be heard and then it was cut off. Harry smiled before saying what he wanted to.
"Hey," he berthed into the phone. It was three in the morning, the only time all the boys would be asleep and not pester him about his late night phone calls."It's me. I miss you so much, but I'm coming back to Miami soon and I'll come and see you. I love you, Sar." Harry hung up the phone. Sarah's parents still payed her phone and Harry took advantage of hearing her voice every night. He never called Marin. But Sarah he called every night.

Chapter 3
(Chapter 3)
Seven Months Later

Still, She consumed his every thought. Sarah. The beautiful Sarah. The mysterious Sarah. The girl he could never have. But he defied the rules. Sarah was his. In his dreams, in reality...she was his. He saw Sarah on the street and in his house and everywhere. There was no escape. Sarah's face was a permanent image under his eyelids. Harry was consumed by her poison.
Harry basically lived in Miami now, and never went two days without seeing Sarah's parents and brother. After the visit with Marin and Mitchell to Sarah's grave, Marin had introduced him to Sarah's parents and they became friends. After that, Luke, Sarah's little brother, had taken quite the liking to Harry, especially when Harry hadn't left him yet. Luke had even started calling him, Uncle Harry. Marin usually stopped by too, but only because the Brady's were her surrogate family, since Marin didn't really have anyone except for Mitchell who had gone back to college five months ago. Harry was never interested in Marin, and only talked to her to find out about Sarah (this, he had realized after he had gone back on tour). Harry had stopped talking to Marin weeks ago. She had told him everything he needed to know. Harry had thought about killing himself to be with her on many occasions but never had the guts to do it, whether he would jump, kick the chair, pull the trigger, or drink in the deathly air. He couldn't leave reality where Sarah was, for an not positive guarantee that he would get to be with her in the end. He didn't know what to do except never leave her. Sometimes he would go visit the cemetery where she was and would lie there with her all night and just talk. Sometimes he could almost hear her voice,
"...to the love of my life, Harry Styles, I love you with all my heart." And he would respond breathlessly, "I love you too, Sar.". He loved her.

Today, Harry was walking to Sarah's house to look at baby pictures with her grandmother who had come for a visit. Everyone in Sarah's family adored Harry and he adored them. He loved them because they were his only connection to her. Harry walked in through the backdoor and into the kitchen where Mr. Brady was sitting at the table staring at Sarah's picture. Harry walked in slowly.
"George?" He asked hesitantly. George turned to Harry, his eyes bloodshot. It was obvious he had been crying. He wiped his nose on his sleeve and stood up to meet Harry. George Brady was a nice man with a lovely smile and fun disposition. He was shorter than Harry but never seemed to mind. Normally, cheerful, Mr. Brady, didn't even attempt a smile when he looked at Harry.
"Where are Tara and Luke?" Harry asked, nervous for some reason. Perhaps it was the way George was looking at him...like he was a wounded puppy with no chance if survival. Marin walked through the wide doorway. She retreated instantly.
"Let her go, Harry." George started to cry again. Harry tried to help him but Marin who seemed to explode from nothing, beat him to it. Mr. Brady shrugged off Marin but looked grateful. She disappeared again.
"You've got to let her go. Look at you. This isn't who she...ugh. Harry, you've got to listen to me. You aren't star crossed lovers. She liked an idea of you and you liked the idea of her. It isn't real love, it can't ever be. You've got to let her go. Please. For Sarah." Mr. Brady had out his hands on Harry's shoulders, trying to bring him back to a reality that didn't exist anymore for Harry. George Brady left the room. Marin sat in a chair at the kitchen table. She had been crying too. Her plain periwinkle t-shirt, stained with the harsh ravine of fallen tears. Harry could see her bikini straps, peaking from the shoulders of the shirt. She played with a solitude straw that lay on the messy with paperwork table.
"He's right. But you didn't need me to tell you that. You know he's right but you choose to believe she's here. She's not Harry. You've got to let her go. Let go of the idea of her. She isn't real." Marin started to shout. "Why can't you see what this is doing!!! This weird idea you have of her, is wrecking you. She's not coming back, Harry. And pretending she's here, isn't going to make her come back. I don't care that you see her when you're on drugs! She doesn't exist!" Marin got up from the table, crying. She started smashing things on the ground, chanting over and over,
"She doesn't exist! She's gone!" Harry stood quickly and wrapped his arms around Marin from behind. They were both crying now.
"Shhh. It's okay. I believe you. It's okay. Shhh." Harry, for the first time, comforted Marin. It felt nice to do something for her, yet he didn't know why. It was nice to be needed by someone who would talk back to you. And that's what broke the spell for Harry. The fact that Sarah didn't need him. Marin needed him. He needed Marin. Just for this moment they needed each other to break the spell of obsession and sad anger. Harry realized, they needed music.
"Marin will you dance with me?" He asked as she turned in his arms, so she was facing his chest. He took the slight movement of her head as a yes and reached for his phone, still in his jean pocket. He plugged into the conveniently placed music dock and hit the playlist, Feel Okay Songs. He didn't know which one to pick so he put it on shuffle. The phone took a minute to register the action. He looked down at Marin, still sniffling and puffed eyed. He realized something. Harry looked at Marin and something shifted when she caught him staring. Sarah was right. She was right.
"What?" She asked smiling and rolling her eyes at him. He continued to look. Why had he never noticed. Marin. Why had he never noticed that Sarah was right...Marin was irresistible.
"Harry, what is it?" She turned serious and he just smiled and shook his head, still looking at her. She nodded and took his hand to dance. Why hadn't he noticed that she looked so much like her. Like the girl in the coffee shop. Like Sarah. He pulled her closer, praying she would notice. She sensed his presence but didn't move, but blew the nonexistent strand of hair from her face (another nervous habit of hers) she turned to look him and he was so close that they breathed in each others exhales.
"Marin..." He trailed off as he reached up to brush a strand of hair away from her face. Marin stopped breathing and eyed his hand suspiciously. Why hadn't he noticed? They could be sisters. They had the same smile.
"What are you doing?" She asked him, nervous yet intrigued. She tried to remain clam as she anticipated his next move. He tried to anticipate hers. Like fate had it in for them, the shuffling iPod, started playing Irresistible and they kept looking into each others faces, choking on the intimate proximity. Marin was brought back to when Harry had quoted this song to her in the stairwell if the church. She couldn't help but smile at the memory.
"Midnight ain't no time for laughing..." They knew what was coming next. They knew what they both wanted. Harry leaned closer to her and she stayed where she was.
"When you say good bye." She was breathing into his parted lips by now and he was breathing into hers. So, when the chorus hit and she leaned in more and BAM! No matter what she had read or seen, it never prepared her to want to faint as a guy kissed her.
That's when they both knew, looking at each other, trying to say without words how irresistible they each were. Harry cupped her cheek and she nuzzled her nose into his palm and he kissed her again. They knew they had loved each other from the first word. Why hadn't she noticed he looked like the man of her dreams? Why hadn't he noticed that she was just like Sarah and she wasn't dead? She wasn't alive till that moment though. Neither was he. But together they were alive and she was irresistible and so was he.

Epilogue

(Epilogue)

Harry had stopped thinking about Sarah. It was as if he had stored her memory in a file and didn't open except on special occasions. Sarah hadn't consumed his thoughts since he kissed Marin. Harry rose back to fame and left the dreaded wet heat of Miami to live in Holmes Chapel, his boyhood home. Harry eventually settled down as best as he could and found a steady girlfriend who he later proposed to. Her name was not Sarah and her name was not Marin. Her name was Lilly Scott and she was a beautiful girl he had gone to school with. She was two years younger than him and he loved being able to show her the world to the best of his ability. They were only nineteen and twenty one when they started dating. Lilly was so nice and very pleasant, kind of like the older sister you never had. She was kind and caring and loved Harry with all her heart, international celebrity or not. Sometimes Harry would lay awake at night and listen to Lilly's breathing and think. He would think about Sarah and her beautiful friend, the one he had kissed in the most cliche moment of his life. He often thought about calling her but he never did. He didn't know what to say. Because Marin and Harry never talked after he left Miami and from what he liked to believe, she was doing fine.

Marin was floating through life. She had been rejected by her flinty pop star "friend", her best friend, who had died years before, had more of Harry's affections than she ever would, and she got a kiss and the cold shoulder by the man she swore felt something too. All of it boiled down to Harry. Marin led disappointment and lived by her life song, A-Team. She had cheap and meaningless sex and did some drugs, she consoled herself that after everything she had been through, it was okay to forget. She would sometimes revel in the fact that Sarah had predicted this. Marin took LSD. She was never addicted, no. She was just stuck. So when an intervention pulled her out of her slump, she got a life and a job and moved out of the basement and away to Boston. She missed the Miami heat but loved the snow and wind. She was meant to be here, she told herself. Until she moved to San Francisco. She was sure she's had found her home and she had. Since she moved away from the east coast, Harry hadn't crossed her mind once.

Harry walked towards the bakery, hoping that Lilly wouldn't wake up before he was back. He hadn't left a note. It was their pre-wedding vacation, something that Harry found totally necessary as Lilly was going insane with details. Harry stood in line trying to find something she would like (lots of chocolate was her thing). The slight sound of tinkling bells signified another customer. The barista acknowledge their presence.

"Hey! I'll have your regular right up!" He smiled at the customer behind Harry.

"That's okay...I'm not in a big hurry today." The woman behind Harry answered. The barista nodded. Harry contemplated before turning around and asking for her help in picking the best things from the menu.

"Excuse me, miss. Would you mind giving me some assistance?" He looked around to see her searching through her bag for something, sunglasses on her head.

"Yeah, sure. What are looking for?" She smiled and he noticed how familiar that smile was. I know you. He thought but shook it off. When she saw his face her smile faltered a bit.

"Chocolate and tea." Harry stated turning back to the menu. "My fiancé is bit of a stickler about San Francisco Chocolate." Harry smiled letting his curls spring forth as he tore his beanie off of his head, still searching for something that contained chocolate.

"Try the Volcano...it's this orange and chocolate thing but for tea I would suggest the marquise tea. It's...irresistible." The woman grabbed her "regular" and started walking out the door. Harry shot around, touching her shoulder and as she turned to see his familiar face, her sunglasses fell from the bridge of her nose. She smiled at him and he smiled at her. She had known who he was all along. Of course she did, he thought but continued to smile anyway.

"Hello, Barry." Her smile continued to shine as she displayed their personal memory. He gave her a quizzical look before answering,
"Hi, Marin."
Fin.