Chapter One - The Seashell

My name is Sebastian Morrison, I’m a normal 17 year old going to highschool at Two Harbors MI. I have a friend named Wyatt and a Mother who loves me. I’m a good person. I would never try to hurt anyone. I tell myself as Mr. Allen, my chemistry teacher drones on about the periodic table. It’s my habit to repeat these words to myself, something that anchors me to reality and is probably the only thing that has kept me sane this past month.
“Sebastian Morrison!” My eyes slowly come back into focus and I look up at Mr. Allen. “What element on the periodic table has a molar mass of 196?”  I frantically look around the room and my eyes drift over to Lindsay’s notes, laid out on her desk.
“Um… Gold?”
Mr. Allen gives me a surprised but pleased look. “Right you are!” I smile to myself, today has been a good day.
Nothing out of the ordinary has happened, it’s been boring, sure, but boring is good. I go back into my own little world of thought. I think about how I have work right after school, My work provides the money that keeps my mom and I going.
My thoughts are interrupted by the noise of a water droplet hitting the bottom of the stone sink just to my right. It jabs into me like a freshly sharpened knife cutting into a slab of cold meat. Another droplet hits the stone with a sound like thunder. I take deep breaths and try to keep the terrible memories from coming to the surface. The surface! If only I could have kept her on the surface she would have been fine. She would have been alive. I grip my desk with increasing intensity, my ghostly white knuckles glistening with sweat. I look around the room to find 30 pairs of eyes staring directly at me. Her eyes. Her big brown eyes. Her eyes were the last thing I saw of her before the cold dark waters of lake Superior swallowed her up. The warm sensation of vomit rises in my throat. I don’t even try to hold it in. I faintly hear Mr. Allen ask me if I need to use the restroom, but it’s too late.
I throw up, luckily I haven’t eaten very much today. I hear screams from my fellow classmates, and see Mr. Allen calling for the school nurse. I stand up, avoiding the small puddle of liquid on the floor and start to walk towards the door. “You’re a freak” someone yells. They step out blocking my path but I shove past them. This is only followed by more insulting remarks. By the time I get to the door I’m in a full out sprint.
I don’t notice or care where I'm going. I just need to get out. Get out of school, get out of work, get out of this s*** hole we humans call life. Tears stream down my face but I don’t bother to wipe them away. I burst into the men’s bathroom. The familiar smell of BO, s***, and cologne hits my nose. My vision slowly clears and I find a stranger standing in the mirror. He has thick, greasy brown hair that hasn’t been combed in weeks. His lanky body is nothing more than skin-and-bone. His once fitting clothes fall over him loose and baggy. The only part of him I recognize are his eyes. They seem out of place compared to the rest of his body. They’re bright green and shine like a beacon.
Dark thoughts cloud my vision. I don’t deserve my eyes. They remind me of her, so bright and full of life. I don’t deserve to be happy. I know that I’m washing all the progress of the past month down the drain, but I realize, I don’t deserve to forget. I can’t help but wonder, do I deserve to be alive?
I can’t stand looking at myself any longer. Before I can stop it, my fist slams into the mirror. I can feel my index finger crack on impact. The pain is tremendous, I feel as if my finger got broken into a million tiny pieces. But the pain feels good. It distracts me. I look at the mirror, not a single crack runs along it. It’s as if my fist was deflected by an invisible forcefield.
Anger rises up inside me. It spreads from my chest all I way to my fingers and toes. I hate this mirror, I hate this world I live in, and more than anything I hate myself. I let out a scream and throw my fist into the mirror with all my might. A small crack forms where my fist hits the glass and I continue. Right, left, right, left, I fall into a rhythm, synced with the thunderous beating of my heart. Every hit widening the crack which now stretches across the length of the mirror. Shards of glass cling to my broken fingers. But I feel nothing, no pain, no anger, no emotion.
I’ve lost track of time. It could have been an hour or a minute. I have no way of knowing but I can feel the mirror begin to give. A spiderweb of cracks cover it to the point of which I can hardly see my own reflection. I give it one final punch with all the force I can manage and watch as the mirror shatters into a thousand pieces of sparkling glass. And I shatter with it. My vision starts to fade, the sounds around me turn into a faint murmur. I notice that I’m falling. I hit the bathroom floor and become submerged by dark waters. 
Blue skies, a warm breeze and the scent of algae flood my senses with happiness. The sun shines bright on my bare skin and I can feel the sting of a sunburn forming on my shoulders. I look out over the vast waters of Lake Superior and a feeling of respect overwhelms me. I can understand how people would mistake it for the ocean. Water stretches out as far as the eye can see and at my side the Grand Sable Dunes encase over five miles of the shoreline.
“Bass!” My attention is pulled away from the scenery and I look over to see my nine year old sister running towards me at full speed. Her brown curls bouncing every step of the way. She stops inches in front of me, spraying me in the face as her sandals dig into the sand. She giggles as I frantically try to clear my stinging eyes. I pick up a handful of sand and toss it back at her, which she easily blocks. This causing another onset of laughter. I love watching her laugh, it's the kind of laugh that could lighten up anyone's day. Her eyes sparkle with excitement and her lips pull back revealing her blinding white teeth.
“Bass! Can we please go down to the water?” Her big brown eyes open wide in a irresistible manner and she looks up at me pleadingly.
“I thought mom made it very clear that you aren't old enough, Ginny,” I say.
“That’s not fair! Mom let you swim when you were ten years old. And I’m nine and three quarters,” she retorts back at me.
I roll my eyes. This is one of the many reasons I love my baby sister. She’s incredibly stubborn and can get away with almost anything. Lucky for her I’m in a good mood today and not wanting to cause a tantrum, I reluctantly give in.
“Fine,” I say, “but no farther than your waist, And most importantly you can’t tell mom!”.
She gives me a big grin “pinky promise?” she says, holding up her tiny pinky.
“Pinky promise.”

I’m brought back to reality by a light tapping on my shoulder. “Sebastian?”
Without even looking up I know who the voice belongs too. God I’m going to be in deep s*** this time. I shouldn’t have let myself slip like that. I slowly lift my head off the cold bathroom floor, not wanting to cause another black out. A layer of drool coats my left cheek and as I attempt to wipe it off a jolt of pain runs from my fingers all the way down my arm. I let out an agonizing groan and my eyes begin to water.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if you broke all ten of your fingers”.
I look up to find the school principal, Mr. Krause looking down at me. His beady black eyes staring into my soul.
“Not only did you hurt yourself, but you vandalized school property.” I stare back at him with the same intensity, not blinking once.
“You could be facing a hefty fine, and even jail time. Am I getting through to you?” I nod my head slightly without losing eye contact.
“So why did you do it?” I knew this was coming but I was ready for it. I look deeper into his eyes. He’s the kind of guy that has never had to get his hands dirty. He must have come from a wealthy family. Rumor has it that he even bought his position as principal. And in an attempt to hide it he’s created a fake reputation around himself. But I see straight through it. It’s a rare gift that I have or maybe a curse. I can see everyone for who they truly are.
“Have you ever lost someone, Mr. Krause?”  I’ve caught him off guard.
“Excuse me?”
“Have you ever lost someone?” He looks away from me and frowns, trying to maintain his cool posture.
“That isn’t relevant, now answer my question.”
“You answer first,” I say sincerely.
This obviously isn’t going as he had planned, a bead of sweat drips off his nose. He hesitates, and the bathroom is completely quiet, apart from the dripping of a faucet. For a second I think he’s going to say something but seems to decide against it. I give him another minute but he is silent.
The sound of an ambulance cuts into the silence and grows increasingly louder.
“Can you stand? We need to get you to the hospital,” Mr. Krause says through clenched teeth. I can tell it’s taking all of his effort not to just leave me here. I push my arms into the floor and attempt to sit up. Excruciating pain shoots up my left arm, I must have broken my wrist, the pain is so great that I scream in agony. The world around me spins. My vision blurs and I can feel my consciousness drifting away. Once again I'm surrounded by darkness.    
The waves of Lake Superior roar into focus, It’s late afternoon and the sun is slowly making its way towards the horizon. I look over to find Ginny beaming at me.
“Look at what I found,” she yells, running over to me in excitement.
She shows me a shell she found on the beach.
“This one's for you, so that you can remember me forever and ever.”
I look down at the shell. It’s a beautiful light blue with spirals of purple.
“I won’t need it, because I'll be with you forever and ever, and I’ll never leave you,” I say.
She gives me a big toothy grin, “I love you Bass.”
“I love you too.”
Just then my friend Wyatt shows up. He’s a short but stocky teenager, he has golden blond hair and bright blue eyes. We have been best friends for as long as I can remember. Our parents raised us together and ever since we have been inseparable. Every week Wyatt and I tackle the cold waters of Lake Superior. He’s stronger than me but not as graceful and we’re an even match for each other. This fall we hope to sign up for the highschool swim team, and the lake is a great way to practice.
“Are you sure you’re up for this?” He asks tauntingly.
“You’re just scared to admit you’re going to lose” I say.
I look over at Ginny.
“Wyatt and I are going to swim for a while, are you okay just staying here for a couple of minutes? Maybe build a sand castle?”.
“You promise you will only be a couple of minutes?”
“I promise, and when I get back I’ll help you build”
I grin at Wyatt. We race down the beach and jump into the cold water.
I’m awoken by the voice of a woman. My eyelids feel heavy and it takes a great deal of effort to open them enough to see. I must be on some sort of pain medication because only a slight throb resonates through my hands. I’m surrounded by white walls and the sound and smell of sickness hit my senses. I’m in the hospital. Above me I can make out the shapes of three doctors who are midway through a conversation.
“We need to go into surgery now, X-rays show his wrist being broken in three separate places, and not to mention he broke all ten of his fingers,” says the woman.
“Krista’s right, we’re going into surgery now,” the gruff voice of a man replies.
“Give him some anesthesia, this could take a while”
I feel a sharp sting on my arm where a needle is inserted and I lose consciousness as quickly as I gained it.
An icy wave crashes over me as I struggle to catch up to Wyatt. It has only been ten minutes since we left the shore but it feels like an hour. The water is more turbulent than usual making it harder to swim. I look back towards the shoreline and I’m surprised on how far we have made it in these conditions. The beach is nothing more than a thin line, and the people look no bigger than dots. I try to find Ginny but it’s an impossible task. A sense of panic hits me, what if she didn’t do what I asked? What if she tried to follow us.
“Wyatt! hold up for a second,” I yell.
He turns around to look at me with an annoyed expression.
“What? Am I going too fast for you?”
Before I can respond I hear something. Something so faint that I’m sure I imagined it. But then I hear it again, and this time louder.
“Sebastian!”
“Sebastian, help!”
I turn around in the direction of the scream, terrified of what I will find. And there she is, so small and out of place, so helpless, and so far away.
“Ginny! I’m coming,” I scream with all my might.
I swim towards her, Wyatt quick on my tail. I swim faster than I’ve ever swam before but every second that passes is another precious second of her life gone. I’m only 100 feet away but everything seems to play in slow motion. I watch as my sister gets hit by a wave twice her size and is plunged underwater only to be thrown up again. She gasps for air but fills her lungs with water as she’s hit by another wave. I’m only 20 feet away now. Our eye’s lock and my heart breaks. She’s too young to die, too innocent and perfect and it’s all my fault. She struggles for air one last time and becomes limp. A calmness has settled over her and I know I’m too late. By the time I reach her she’s already gone.
I don’t accept that she’s gone, I can’t. With the help of Wyatt we bring her limp body to the shore and drag her onto the beach. I notice something clamped in her hand and carefully open her delicate fingers. Pressed against the palm of her hand is the seashell she wanted to give me. I burst into tears, realizing that she’s actually gone. Realizing that it’s all my fault. Realizing that I’ll never be able to see her big brown eyes, curly hair and blinding smile.  
I wake up with a start. Tears stream down my face and I wipe them away with my now bandaged hands. I had surgery and I must have been out for a while judging by the position of the sun. I sit up and reach my hand into my pocket, my fingers are clumsy and awkward feeling with the bandages but I manage to pull out a small thin object. I look down at the seashell and remember back to what she told me.
“This one's for you, so that you can remember me forever and ever,” and for the first time in weeks I smile.