Tick, tock, tick, tock. She lays in bed on a quiet Tuesday morning. Joan Parker is your typical mom. A mother of two, the wife of a lawyer, stay at home mom. Her family didn’t have a lot of help. Except for the one maid she struggled to find that would work for her and would feel welcome. As her alarm clock rings at exactly 5:30 am, she slowly and quietly peels her covers off as slow as possible not to wake her. Wonderful and understanding husband, Kenneth, laying next to her. She slowly waddles to the bathroom seeing as she is 28 weeks pregnant with her 3rd child. Her first girl.  She loved her boys Dean and Phillip with all her heart. But something about having a girl made her heart skip a beat. Her boys were four years old and two years old. Her two kids were a blessing. She struggled for many years to have the two, soon to be three children she has. From feeling empty to, knowing when the feeling was coming, she had many angels up in heaven looking down on her.

As Joan started the shower, she knew today would be a long day. Thursday, the day when all the women of the society would gather in her neighbors home and exclude her. Her help, Mrs. Theresa Jones a 50 year old black woman who was her only friend. After her shower, she makes breakfast as well as she can. She was not a very good cook. After kenneth had left, and Theresa arrived, her boys were playing outside. She hadn’t been feeling well all day. As she sat down on her couch, she began to feel a familiar feeling. And it was not a good feeling.

When the ambulance began to pull away, she couldn’t imagine feeling like this again. The thought ran through her head. ”The lord must have destined me to only have my two boys”. That familiar feeling rushed through her body, she began to weep. “Oh lord, Oh lord what have I done wrong to deserve this”. She yelled as they pulled into the hospital. Mr. Parker was already there waiting for her.

When they rode home from the hospital, she realized why she was such an outcast from the other women. They thought she was broken, sinned, not good enough to carry a daughter. She knew her husband would understand why she had lost her baby but, a part of her felt as though she wasn’t good enough for him. She wasn’t permitted to get out of bed. She was on bed rest for three days. Mr. Parker would help with the children but Mrs. Theresa would be around longer just like she has been the three previous times before this. She would make sure she ate, take her medicine and made sure the boys were clean.

“Mrs. Theresa, do you have any children.” Joan asked

“ yes ma’am. Three in heaven and two on earth.” theresa said with tears on the brink of slipping out of her eyes.

One of her boys was killed on the bus. He helped a white woman off the bus and the cops had beaten him till he was dead. He was 22 years old when he died.