“Alright settle down kids,” my english teachers says. I am sitting in class waiting for lunch. “Well if we have to settle down then let's all settle for a nap,” the class clown Eric says. I used to laugh at these jokes but I haven't since he helped in what I describe as the day I will never forget and will haunt me forever. Around me everyone laughed or rolled their eyes. “That is enough Eric see me after class.” Eric and his body todd did their annoying little handshake thing that they have always done since kindergarten. 

Oh, I forgot to mention that 99% of the people in this high school I have known since we were kids. Click, Click, Click. “Ugh not again, whenever we hear those high heels it means trouble,” Jess said. Jess has been my best friend ever since she moved to this town in third grade. “I know either one of the boys finally got in trouble or something bad happened,” I replied. Crash, “oops sorry,” Eric said. He and the boys laughed he just ‘accidentally’ knocked over one of the piles of books. My head starts spinning I remember this sound all too well…. 2 months ago, CRASH “Hahaha,” I said. 

The whole class started laughing over Eric knocking down the stack of books. “That is enough class settle down!!!!” My teacher screamed over the chaos. “It’s so cute to see you smiling again,” Josh said then kissed me on the check. After he had a sheepish grin on his face at the time I thought it was adorable. “Well I could smile more if someone had a car and we could drive over to Starbucks,” I said. He smiled. Over all the yelling and laughing he and I managed to get out of the classroom. 

We skipped down the hall like we were prince and princess going over to our castle. We slipped out of the building and got into his car. “Emily, Emily” I heard. That snapped me back to reality and I am back again in my english classroom. “Emily Creed are you here,” I raise my hand instinctively not even knowing who it was or what was happening. “Thank you Emily can you come down to guidance with me,” Mrs. Egan says. 

I look around the room and see that everyone is staring at me, well everyone except Eric because he knows that if I go to the police about what he did, he and his parents reputation would be ruined. Mrs. Egan's eyes started piercing into me wanting me to say something. I slowly nodded my head and was about to get up when I heard Eric whisper something to todd, “Aww the girl with depression has to go to guidance so sad.” I turned around so quickly that a gust of wind was hurled at the people around me. 

“Aww the guy who writes love notes to his teachers thinks making fun of someone is cute,” I said out loud. I had been saving that line ever since he and josh did what they did, I figured that I would have to use it eventually and in that moment I finally had the guts to do it. “I..I..I” Eric stutterd. 

Mrs. Egan looked at me in disbelief as I walked over to the door and started walking over to guidance. She hurried after me well the whole class started whispering about what I just disclosed, even my english teacher looked at him differently. In third grade he wrote a love note to his computer teacher saying how she was the prettiest techar in the world, and yes that is how he spelled teacher all through his elementary school years. His parents threatened to go to the school board if the teachers didn’t stop people from making fun of him so no one has talked about it since. 

“Emily what has gotten into you,” Mrs. Egan said in disbelief, “you used to be such a good student and a hard worker but ever since you dad went missing and the ‘situation’ with Josh I don’t know what has gotten into you.”

All of the teachers call what happened to me the ‘situation’, “Well he made fun of me to his best buddyTodd and I was sick of everyone thinking that I was just a poor little depressed girl so I stuck up for myself,”

“Look Emily I know I has been hard for you and if someone does say that stuff come talk to me.” She said, “But I have to lay down the line here and you need to get your grades up and have some fun in life.” This was the same conversation we had every time she took me to guidance. She would always tell me to do better in school and have fun but her ‘pep talks’ never really worked on me. “Fine, I’ll try ok. Can I just go back to class I have to get my stuff or I’ll be late to lunch.” She sighed but nodded her head anyways. I walked out of the guidance office but not back into my english class.

 What none of my teachers notice is that I take my backpack with me everywhere and I have never left my stuff just laying around since two months ago. So what Mrs. Egan never noticed is that after our ‘chats’ (that's what she calls them) I always go into the courtyard to do homework or just read. She usually takes me into guidance during lunch or study hall but today she took me during english. Crunch, Crunch I looked over to the door to get into the courtyard and saw Eric standing there. He put his hands up in surrender, “Hey, I'm not here to cause any trouble I just came out to get some air.” 

“Well you could go out of the front doors of the school run home and then transfer to a different school, oh I know what school ju ve then you would have a full hour of air every day.” I turned back to face all of the flowers but I could still feel the pain in his eyes. 

“Look I know what me and josh did was wrong….” I grimaced at that name “....but we did it to protect you.” 

I turned my head and looked right into his eyes, “No you didn’t. You did it for the money, you did it so you could know what it felt like to do something bad you and…” I stopped myself because I haven't said that name since the police questioned me, 

“...josh did not do it to protect me. And if you did do it to protect me then why are you still blackmailing me so I won’t tell the police about your part in this.” At this point I was standing and furious and done with all the excuses. 

“You know what I don’t know why I don’t want you to tell the police and I don’t know why your dad involved us in this sick game of his but I do you why I said yes,” he took one step closer to me but I felt like he was an inch away, “so we could protect you and make sure you didn’t get hurt.”

“Well if you didn’t want me getting hurt you should have told me what he said and I would have dealt with him myself.” I grabbed my backpack and walked as fast as I could to lunch. 

“So I was wondering if you wanted to go to the mall later,” Jess said. We were sitting at our usual table. Second closest to the kitchen to the left of the trash cans. “I mean I only have $20 left from the movies but I could just get something small,” Trish said.

“Oh that's fine I was just thinking of going to sephora to get a face mask and then mabey to lunch,” Jess said back. 

“Oh thats cool, Em you up for it,” 

“Um what,” I said. I wasn’t really listening to what they were talking about I just zoned out like I always did. “I said do you want to go to the mall.” 

“Sure,” I always had money to go shopping because after what happened todd and his parents paid me $100,000 to keep quiet about his part in it. My parents said they didn’t want me to take it but I did because I knew that was the only way to get out of that sichuation. “Sorry I’m just tired and focused on a lot of work,” I said.

“You don’t have to be sorry just let us take you out to the mall and have some fun,” Jess smiled. I nodded and pushed all the thoughts I had in my head 5 minutes ago away. “Now do you guys want to go get dessert,” Trish said. I made an attempt at a smile and Jess just nodded so we got up and back in the kitchen to get some frozen yogurt. 

As I was walking I felt someone watching me I turned to my left and saw Todd sitting with his friends watching me, he turned away but not before our eyes met for a split second. I really didn’t know why he was watching me but I got annoyed by it. “I think Todd is watching me,” 

“Ok well how bout you give him a taste of revenge for that and everything else,” Jess said. She knew about what he did, she and my mom were the only ones. 

“What kind of revenge are you talking about,” Jess saw the excitement in my eyes and replied, “Let’s walk by his table and see what happens.” Jess and I went out of the kitchen and walked towards the table him and the ‘popular’ boys were sitting at, far right corner farthest away from the trash cans perfect view of the whole lunch room. That table and our table were the ones that everyone wanted to sit at so they were always crowded. 

“Hey Emily what are you doing over here,” Rick said. He was one of the most popular boys.

“Oh I was just getting frozen yogurt when I saw one of your boys staring at me you wouldn’t happen to know if you can tell your ‘guys’ to stop staring before I kick there asses would ya.” I said. I was taller than most of those boys so they never really crossed me but todd was not one of them, he made the mistake of standing up. “Emily just leave them alone I was staring at you ok I was looking around the room saw you for a second then turned away when you looked at me because I was embarrassed.” 

“Well when you look around the room go and stare at some other girl and keep your eyes away from me.” Me and Jess turned around and walked back to our table, I could feel all the boys looking at me but I didn’t really care. “Hey about the mall later if you don’t want to go that's ok, I know you have been just keeping to yourself lately,” Jess said. 

“No its ok I should get out of the habit of school home, school home and go have some fun.” Jess smiled happy that I actually wanted to go. “Ok so I was thinking of getting this really cute plaid mini skirt that would go really cute with my black crop top for my holiday party,” she took out her phone and showed me the skirt, “cute right.” 

“Ya it’s really cute, I think it would look adorable with your black heels with the cross pattern on them.”

“That's what I was thinking too, and for you I was thinking of a red maxi dress with your gold heels,” we both started laughing. Jess was talking about the outfit I was going to wear for my 16th birthday party, but that was canceled because of the ‘situation’ and we have been joking about if ever since. “Kids get to class!” one of the teachers yelled. 

“Call me after school about the mall, k” I said to Jess. 

“K, see you after school,” then Jess and I started walking to our next classes. 

As I was walking to my next class I tried to hold onto that feeling of happiness that doesn’t come very often. I squeezed it in my hand hoping it would stay there but as soon as I let my hand relax that happy feeling was gone.