Interfaith Marriage | Teen Ink

Interfaith Marriage

January 8, 2011
By thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
67 articles 0 photos 336 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry that it's over, smile because it has happened."


Interfaith marriages are prominent throughout the world, whether it is a Christian/Jewish marriage, a Buddhist/Hindu marriage, or any other blend of two different faiths. In an interfaith marriage, divergent religions join together and create a family; both parents put in their doses of what they grew up with and traditions they are accustomed to. This kind of marriage develops a lifestyle where it is allowed, and even encouraged, to speak one’s mind and explore other beliefs. It creates a warm, flexible environment where change and discussion is welcomed. Interfaith marriage can lead to a greater understanding among religions and an enriched family life.
By bringing both cultures into the family, a couple that consists of two different faiths can better educate children and each other on the different aspects of each religion. When one of the spouses in an interfaith marriage is not as religious, the marriage is more likely to survive than when both are extremely observant (www.religioustolerance.com). This allows room for the children to explore their own beliefs, without the parents disagreeing over what they each believe to be the truth. From their own upbringings, both parents can teach the children about their beliefs based on what they grew up with (www.religioustolerance.com). This gives the children a more expansive understanding about two different religions, therefore augmenting their knowledge about the world around them. Children in a single-faith marriage grow up in a household that teaches one specific belief, rather than exploring different customs (www. dlerner01.typepad.com). In an interfaith marriage, children become aware of different cultures early on and are more likely to tolerate other religions.
A family that is formed by two different faiths creates a fulfilling atmosphere and a strong base to build family values. Because most religions do not celebrate the same holidays, there is not any conflict around whose side of the family to visit. For example, in a Christian/Jewish marriage, the Hanukkah and Christmas celebrations are observed on separate days (www.dlerner01.typepad.com). As a result, the amount of arguing is decreased, creating a more pleasant and stable place for everyone. When two spouses from different faiths decide to bring their children up a certain way, they make a commitment to each other and to their sons and daughters. The determination and will to change in order to compromise has the power to unite a family and bring them closer. Additionally, early on, the couple must decide which traditions to continue and how to deal with the aspects of church and holidays (www.interfaithfamily.com). This strengthens the couple, teaching them how to adjust to family life, and how to meet halfway in a tough situation.
Because of the contrasting faiths, some say that interfaith marriages are more likely to lead to divorce and conflict within the family. However, due to the mixture of traditions and cultures, everyone in the family becomes more knowledgeable about other religions in the world. Furthermore, the couple becomes better acquainted with each other’s past, allowing each to know more about the other’s background. A family that consists of a single-faith marriage solely depends on their own religion. Consequently, the children are more likely to become defined by their religion, rather than branching out and accepting the beliefs of others.
Within an interfaith marriage, freedom of speech and belief is encouraged. But more than encouraged, the ability to speak one’s mind is essential for the marriage and family to remain healthy. The whole idea of an interfaith marriage is two people, who have fallen in love, working together to form a family that consists of both backgrounds. If the family is not loose and welcoming to other religions, the point of compromise is futile. Interfaith marriage delivers a message that challenges popular beliefs that religion is the most important thing. Sometimes love steps in and distracts the couple. Sometimes love demands a compromise. A compromise that introduces a world filled with exciting unknowns. A compromise called interfaith marriage.



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This article has 8 comments.


on Aug. 8 2011 at 1:25 pm
thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
67 articles 0 photos 336 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry that it's over, smile because it has happened."

I have said everything I needed to say about the matter. Thanks for your opinion.

on Aug. 8 2011 at 12:08 pm

When I read your response a while ago, I was at a loss for words. I didn't respond because I realized that reasoning with you would be like reasoning with a wall. However I recently realized that my silence may have implied that I somewhat agreed with what you wrote- which is totally not the case. I am therefore going to try to attempt gathering my thoughts and presenting them in the politest, most politically correct way that I can.

You write about your religious background and education; Christian holidays spent with family and Jewish Sunday school, Jewish youth groups, and a Bat Mitzvah. If that is all the exposure you have had to those religions, you do not know a thing about either. Do you know the entire Bible backwards and forwards and inside out? How many years have you spent studying the Talmud or the Testaments- both old and new? If only Jesus or Moses were alive today for you to tell them the truth that they were scammed. Because at the ripe old age of seventeen or eighteen or however old you are, you know the truth. According to this logic, quantum-machanics and Harvard-level advanced physics is also a scam, because you do now understand it (I am assuming:-)). You are not an atheist; you are an ignoramus.


on Mar. 16 2011 at 9:08 am
thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
67 articles 0 photos 336 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry that it's over, smile because it has happened."

No, there is definitely still faith. For example, my father is Jewish and my mother is Christian. As a result, I was brought up in a Jewish household where I go to Sunday school, learn Hebrew, and am bat mitzvah-ed. Additionally, I still celebrate Christmas and Easter in order to spend time with my mom's family. My dad is more religious than my mom, which is why he pushed harder for my sister and I to be raised in a Jewish household.

As a result of my parents being so loose about my religion, I made my own decisions as to what I believe in because I didn't feel pressured in either direction. After being bat mitzvah-ed, going to Sunday School for 10 years, and participating in Jewish youth groups, I can now consider myself athiest which is a faith.

Obviously there are two sides to this argument and neither of us are going to admit that they are wrong because neither of us are wrong. That's the thing about religion or faith: there is not right or wrong. Thanks so much for your opinion -- I really appreciate it!


on Mar. 15 2011 at 6:22 pm
Sorry, I guess I am so passionate about this subject (both of my parents are very religious and belong to the same religion, in case you couldn't tell:-)) and was so eager to respond, I didn't read your article throughly. I still disagree, though. If the parents aren't religious, it should not be called an interfaith marriage. The word "faith" implies a belief. If a person is not religious, there is nothing that he specifically believes in and there is no faith involved. In my opinion, someone who is willing to enter into an interfaith marriage so that his kids will get a fusion of both religions, is like someone who marries two girls because he can't decide which one he likes better. Just like marriage is a mutually exclusive relationship between man and wife, religion is a mutually exclusive relationship between a person and God and there is no room for compromise.

on Mar. 14 2011 at 6:05 pm
thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
67 articles 0 photos 336 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry that it's over, smile because it has happened."

Thanks, I always love hearing from the other perspective. However, as I stated in the article, the people whom I was mainly talking about were couples who weren't as religious, who could therefore be more willing than others to accept an interfaith marriage.

I am brought up in an interfaith marriage where neither of my parents are very religious, but religious enough for me to understand both sides of the religion and then consequently choose where I'd like to be.

That's just my angle though, and I'm sure there are many others.


Confuzzelled said...
on Jan. 23 2011 at 5:00 pm
Although you have made a lot of interesting thought-provoking points, I disagree entirely. You are writing on the premise that religion is a cultural thing, not a basis of belief. If it were merely a matter of culture, interfaith marriages would be a wonderful thing. But if you believe that religion is way of life and comes with an entire belief system, marrying someone from a different faith shows you are someone who compromises on your beliefs; something that is certainly not commendable.

on Jan. 14 2011 at 1:53 pm
Thesilentraven PLATINUM, Mableton, Georgia
40 articles 2 photos 1632 comments

Favorite Quote:
"il piu nell' uno," (according to Emerson, an Italian expression for beauty)

"Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality" ~Emily Dickinson

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain"
~Kahlil Gibran

I have, as well, found that children brought up in families with parents of different faiths have more insight into their religion. Thank you for writing this complelling and intellectual article.

on Jan. 14 2011 at 1:52 pm
Thesilentraven PLATINUM, Mableton, Georgia
40 articles 2 photos 1632 comments

Favorite Quote:
"il piu nell' uno," (according to Emerson, an Italian expression for beauty)

"Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality" ~Emily Dickinson

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain"
~Kahlil Gibran

You brought up a considerable number of good points and your argument is unquestionably reasonable. I hold the same stance as you and am delighted to encounter your wisdom about the matter.