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Stonewalled
“Does it affect your home life?”
“You mentioned mood swings, correct?”
“Does it affect your son?”
“Umm.” I force my fingernails deeper into my palms
praying the verge of tears back to where they were formed
I couldn't eat or sleep, is it true to always be honest with your doctor?
“I don't think I struggle in those areas, at least not from what I believe”
The white coated woman types more into her computer
How much would this cost me?
“Any signs of panic attacks?”
Only when I was alone, stuck with intrusive thoughts
She shot me a reassuring smile as I interpreted her questions, but it only reeked of wealth
“Nope,” I shot her a quivering smile, “not that I can think of”
Would this cost me our groceries for the next two weeks?
How much could I throw away to help myself?
20 dollars?
15 dollars?
This appointment is taking too long, how much more will I have to pay the daycare?
What time was it anyway?
Down to 10 dollars
“Any other questions? I must go pick up my son,” one more smile
“Nope, all set my dear”
I stood up from my chair, relieved
“Thank you so much”
“Just one last thing, I'm going to put you on some anti-anxiety medication, which location would you prefer to pick it up at?”
She flashed me the screen but I only saw my life flash before my eyes
“How much will that cost me?” I took an eager step back
“Only around $3.53 up front, other then that we cover any additional fees”
“Oh,” I stood, practically gawking at the woman now, “Thank you.”
“Of course, now what location would you like ma'am?”
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With lines from “The Other Victims” by Terry Greene Sterling and Marie Baronnet, a Pulitzer Center reporting project