Confusion sets in

like a horrible shot in the side

I cannot escape it

no matter how hard I try

what I feel and what I want

are sometimes so similar

but often so different

is it a Friday night date I'm looking for

or a permanent figure in my life

am I searching for restrictions and rules

or do I need freedom and openness

what do I want

what do I need

why does my head tell me one thing

while my heart beckons for another

I am confused

with no escape in sight

every morning every night

I think about choices

which ones are right

and which ones are not

feelings which resurface

are they safe or just a trap

is the advice from my friends worthy

or just a bunch of selfish nonsense

help me please what should I do

I often call out to innocent bystanders

when actually I know I'm the only one

who can help

or hurt myself.