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countdown.
five.
 
 i wish to disappear
 between the cracks in
 cement, the stars in the
 sky and the spaces between
 seconds. i wish to disappear
 from the world; hide and become
 nothing.
 
 but i'm too terrified
 that no one will bother
 to remember me.
 
 
 four.
 
 everything is
 fading. light is less
 bright, the colors of the world
 less vibrant. life
 and hope and happiness
 feel like the
 stars - close enough
 to see; too far to ever
 reach.
 
 
 three.
 
 i am at the door
 to your heart. i knock,
 my voice pleading for you to
 just hear me, just
 hear me, please.
 
 i keep knocking until i
 finally realize -
 
 no one is home.
 
 
 two.
 
 i scream,
 fingernails digging into
 skin, lungs burning.
 there is no escape,
 there is no
 
 escape. i scream
 until life suffocates me,
 until i have no voice
 left, and all that remains is
 
 silence.
 
 
 one.
 
 i am counting down
 to my own destruction.
 everything you do, anything
 you say -
 
 well, it's all
 
 too late.
 
 zero.
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