choking me till I can’t breathe | Teen Ink

choking me till I can’t breathe

April 21, 2021
By aims BRONZE, Dubai, Other
aims BRONZE, Dubai, Other
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

talking gives me anxiety.
the thoughts in my head control me.
the never-ending self-doubt.
choking me till I can’t breathe.
a simple conversation is hard to hold.
I promise I’m not cold.
just suffering from crippling anxiety
I wish it would just let me breathe.
the constant fear of being judged is all I see.
sometimes I just stare in the mirror.
and curse
at my ugly little body
and the scars that cover me
cuz who would love a broken girl like me.
and in these crowds, I cannot speak.
the fog in my mind won’t let my words free.
the grip on my throat holds me back!
and my hands shake like it is 5 degrees.
but I just smile and act like I m fine
cuz u make me feel like it is not a big deal
but I can't suck it up and act like I m free
cuz I m in a cage and I will break free


The author's comments:

Ever since I was a young girl, I have suffered from panic attacks and social anxiety, and some people I have come across have made me feel like what I am feeling is just a fragment of my imagination or think I am doing this just for attention and I hope that while reading this poem, everyone suffering knows that they are not alone, knows that they can make it, knows this is real.


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This article has 2 comments.


on May. 4 2021 at 9:24 am
WolvesRain ELITE, Walton, Kentucky
117 articles 1 photo 190 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every secret of a writer's soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind, is written large in his works." Virginia Wolf

I feel the same, I have Bipolar disorder, social anxiety, and many other things wrong with me and just like you, they think I do it for attention.

on May. 4 2021 at 9:23 am
WolvesRain ELITE, Walton, Kentucky
117 articles 1 photo 190 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every secret of a writer's soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind, is written large in his works." Virginia Wolf

Love it!