If I were in charge of the world
I'd Blow Canada off the face of the map
Using a giant robotic Joey Stalin nuclear weapons platform tank,
To cause the maple syrup stocks to skyrocket

If I were in charge of the world
There'd be no one to resist my jihad of 8-track tapes,
Because I would have multiple legions of Fidel Castro and Andrew Jackson clones
To replace the UN peacekeeping forces

If I were in charge of the world
You wouldn't be allowed to own 8-track tapes.
You wouldn't be allowed to use FDA approved toothpaste.
You wouldn't be allowed to support the heathenism of Steve Jobs by purchasing an Apple product.
Or be permitted to listen to any other music genre than polka.

If I were in charge of the world.