The tears fall down my checks, the makeup burns my eyes
But when I think about you leaving sometimes I want to die
I lived through the first time that you disappeared
Although my vein’s cried blood, and my eyes bled tears
Some days I wanted death
I couldn’t take the pain anymore
I was destroyed, Defeated, but already forgotten
Breathing without you, almost impossible
I screamed
I loved you
I hated you
I wanted you to come back
I never wanted to see you again
I wanted to forget
I needed to remember
I saw you when I closed my eyes
I slept for days
I couldn’t take it anymore
I stayed awake
I held myself
I hurt myself
I loved myself
I wanted to die
Now looking back I’m just glad I survived