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Broken Heart
I don’t know what happened,
I’m always thinking of you,
I’m not even sure that we really are done,
Even though we’re through.
When we were together,
I got so scared,
But you were always there for me,
Even when no one else cared.
Now I’m in a state of confusion,
Nothing is making any sense,
But I can’t stop myself from thinking,
You really were the best.
At first you were everything,
You were my whole world,
Then I wanted nothing to do with you,
And that’s when our relationship untwirled.
I hate seeing you hurt,
I know this is all my fault,
I can’t tell you how sorry I am,
That our relationship came to a halt.
I was never completely whole,
Even from the start,
Its hard to love someone,
When you already had a broken heart.
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This article has 7 comments.
The structure was off, which hurt the rhyming scheme again. Some sentences can be shortened, which would help. It's a poem, you can get away with being grammatically incorrect sometimes.
But I really do love the message of the poem; its timeless, which means that its overused, but everyone loves to see it every time we see it (when its done right, which it is here)
I really enjoyed reading it. I could really feel the emotions your were trying to betray.
Really good writing.
Pretty decent. Nice flow and rhythm.
I would appreciate it if you read one or more of the following articles: "How Do They Feel?", "Smiles", or my poem "Over the Hills"
Thanks