I honestly don't know which is worse.
Saying goodbye to something great
That I know I don't need,
Or saying hello again to all the bad things
That a good girl can't keep away.


Even a woman,
Ripened and bred in the eye of love,
Can't deny that being swallowed alive
Is worth breaking all the rules to avoid.
It wells in your heart slowly,
Slowly collecting weight until our body leans forward
With all the guilt and loneliness.


Soon after, all your tears run out,
Even if you never cried them.
You lose the will to let the feelings out.
You become accustomed to holding it in.
You lose the ability to beautify the tragedy,
And it just dulls into consuming sadness.
Nothing but an infection.

Well I'm sick again,
Because I chose to do what I should
Instead of what I wanted.
But now I feel renewed
Along with feeling destroyed.
Now how could that be?


I let the hope of butterflies and giddiness
Romance me into making a bad choice.
And then the bliss faded away
And it was time to grow up.
I don't know how to make sense of it anymore.
I don't even know how to explain it in the simplest of words.
What is simplicity anymore anyway?


I just want you to be just as ok with moving on as I am.
I don't want to be smiling through this sickness
ButI can't help it, I made the choice.
I'm a good girl again.
So you go on and live your life...