This Is Why I Hurt | Teen Ink

This Is Why I Hurt

June 25, 2014
By peterslostgirl16 BRONZE, Mesa, Arizona
peterslostgirl16 BRONZE, Mesa, Arizona
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment

My heart hurts
And I say it out loud
Everyone assumes it's because of the movie that's on
My head hurts
And I say it out loud
Everyone assumes it's because I ate a little too much sugar
My body hurts
And I say it out loud
Everyone assumes it's because I'm tired from swimming
But do you know
The reason
That my heart
My head
My body
The reason
That they hurt
You assume
Like everyone else
That I no longer weep for you
There is truth in that statement
I do not weep for the boy you are
I would not go back
That time is done
That time is gone
You've changed
And I guess I have too
I try not to let you bug me
Try not to see the change
Your different now
No one believes me
and it drives me insane
They all tell me
It's just the breakup finally sinking in
But that's the thing
I'm over it
I'm over you
But why do I feel pain?
Because I miss having someone
To hold my hand while I squeal
Because of an onscreen movie kiss
Or a scene that gives me "the feels"
I miss having someone to hold me
When I'm tired and don't want to stand
I miss having someone to carry me
When I'm done and don't want to swim
I miss having a boyfriend
I'll admit it
But that word doesn't quite explain it
I don't need a make out session
Or a promise of forever
I need someone to cuddle with
Someone to go to the movies with
Someone to bring me ice cream when I need it
I just want a guy
Who won't make me cry
Or make me feel like an idiot
I want someone to believe in me
To believe in me and my hopes and my dreams
I need someone to tell me that I can do anything
I just need a person
My person
A person that's all my own
I don't want it to be you
I told you I'm through
But I miss those times we had
I'm sure people think
That this is all just a phase
That we'll end up together like we would
But I refuse
I really am through. Period. Enough. The end.
It's over
I'm over you
But I'm not over
The role you played
The spot you filled
Or the ache that now fills my chest
So when I complain that
My heart hurts
My head hurts
My body hurts
That's why
My heart hurts
My head hurts
My body hurts
I want a guy

The author's comments:
I wrote this after I saw my ex. He's still hanging out with all of my friends. Which is fine. Just every time I see him I get so annoyed and my whole body, head and heart just ache. And this us about why.

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