Ever since I was a little girl I
knew I wasn't like everyone else.
It wasn't a phase, it's who I am.
I like boys... and girls.
They said I mistook envy of the other girls as love but I hadn't.
I looked at the girls with soft skin and dainty hands the same way
I looked at the boys who played baseball.
I had crushes on girls, and secretly flirted,
Always hiding from people.
But this girl, she made me want to stop hiding.
Like I could fight the fear but,
I was too afraid.
I wasn't ready, but I feared that if I didn't fight I would lose her.
So I wrote her love songs and sang them to myself. I wrote her poems she would never see. I reached into the deepest part of me and drew for her what no one else could see.
I wanted her, but loving her seemed so wrong, it was forbidden.
But it felt so right so...
I loved her, but I kept it hidden...