When I started watching Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2, having never seen the last movies, I expected a funny movie for none of the right reasons. I expected a stupid, stupid plot, terrible writing, and a plot that goes nowhere. I wasn’t far off.

Let me say this, I am not one of those hardcore Twilight haters. I do, though, hate this movie. Everybody knows the main characters and actors in this movie, so I won’t spend time with introducing them, because I’m lazy and don’t want to write about stuff I don’t care about. These characters were portrayed, for the most part, pretty blandly and didn’t really show any emotion. But they weren’t all bad. Some characters, like Peter Facinelli’s character, did seem like real people. While none of them were Oscar worthy, they are worth mentioning. My favorite character was Michael Sheen’s character. He was creepy and intimidating at times. While some were okay, others were just horrid. One of the main characters, Edward, always gave an awkward pause when someone talks to him and gives a really bad Clint Eastwood impression when he starts talking. Every other character (even Bella), is completely forgettable.

The plot is about vampires that don’t suck the blood of humans (except for one dude), and just drink the blood of cougars instead. They also have psychedelic orgasms, a bad white haze effect when they run at light-speed. There are also werewolves that are wide believers of pedophilia. I’m not kidding. They try to play it off by saying its natural and all that but…come on…..these dudes are pedophiles. So the basic rundown of what’s happening is Bella had a baby vampire/human and this gets the attention of basically, an extremist vampire cult that says baby vampires are bad….because…….they destroy villages….I think….? I’m sorry but this plot was pretty bad. The characters and writing and acting and everything else that has to do with…well everything is pretty terrible. If you are anything like me, you tried to actually take the movie seriously for the first ten minutes, until the first sex scene came. Then I became one of those people in a movie theater. You know; the ones who keep their cellphones on, whisper loudly to their friend, and laughing when parts are supposed to be sad.

Now…the ending. All of you who care about this movie, go someplace else or just read the last paragraph. The ending is what topped it all off. During the whole movie I was relatively bored. I didn’t think the movie was god-awful but definitely boring. When the final battle came, heads were (literally)flying, protagonists were dying, it was such a fun time! I loved it, but…..then….you figure out……THAT…..It’s all a dream. Yup. All a dream. When That happened I started screaming “B.S.!” out loud. This truly says something about the film. It says that it isn’t brave enough to take risks. No, no, it NEEDS the happily ever after. No one dies, no blood is shed.

So after that terrible ending, I came out of the theater thinking how bad this movie was. It still is but I can’t help but feel bad for these actors. You can tell that they truly are trying but the writing is just too bad for them to improve it in some ways. Yes, there were some stuff that I liked, for example, some of the vampires are thousands of years old and you can see the experience they have had, but at the end of the day, this is just a bad movie.