Gordon Ramsay and the Legend of the Lamb Sauce | Teen Ink

Gordon Ramsay and the Legend of the Lamb Sauce

October 6, 2021
By Anonymous

“WHERE’S THE F*** LAMB SAUCE?” Gordon tore apart the massive million dollar kitchen in search of his sauce. He rampaged for 10 minutes. Eventually, he ran out of energy and fell to the floor. The kitchen was ravaged. Torn apart shelves, smashed measuring tools, and even cracked tile littered the hardwood floor. The door opened, and his wife Tana stepped through.

“Gordon, oh my god what have you done!?” She had a horrified look on her face. “I thought you were done with these kinds of outbursts.”

“Honey, it was justified. We don’t have any lamb sauce,” Gordon replied calmly.

“That’s it Gordon. This is the last straw. You’re going to anger management therapy.”

Gordon’s eyes widened. He let out one last scream before he was taken away to the horrors of the anger management therapy office.



Gordon’s chauffeur opened the door to the black Chevy Suburban. Gordon felt the rush of dry Los Angeles heat slap him in the face. He then got his first good look at the therapy office. It looked more like a temple or monastery than an office. He walked cautiously to the front door before stepping inside.

The inside was large and open with few windows. Various potted plants were scattered around the room. A path of brown carpet led up to a small flight of stairs. At the top of these stairs sat a short man facing away from the door.

“I have been expecting you,” the man said in a rather high pitched voice.

“Well I did schedule my appointment for 2:00 and it is currently 2:00,” Gordon responded.

“Well in that case let us begin.” The man rose from the floor and slowly walked down the stairs. “Can you tell me exactly what caused your anger?” The man waved his hands around like he was a wizard.

Gordon reluctantly responded, “I guess it was because we didn’t have any lamb sauce for a dish I was cooking and that made me very mad. The dish tastes terrible without lamb sauce.”

“That sounds like a fine reason to get mad.” The man stood still in thought.

“Exactly!” Gordon was slightly surprised by this response but he did agree. “Why am I even here anyways! I’m leaving.”

“Please wait Mr. Ramsay.” The man was standing completely still on one foot with his eyes closed. “I may not be able to help with your anger but I may be able to help with something else. You don’t have any lamb sauce you say?”

“That’s right,” Gordon stopped at the door.

“I know where you can find so-”

“TELL ME NOW!” Gordon ran at the man and started to shake him violently. “WHERE IS THE LAMB SAUCE!?”

Despite his size, the man ripped Gordon off of him. “There is an ancient temple in the jungles of Peru, known as the temple of the lamb. In this particular temple there lies only the most coveted food item ever created: The legendary lamb sauce.”

Without even questioning the validity of this story, Gordon dashed out the door. Gordon had only one goal in mind. Find the lamb sauce.



Getting into the middle of the rainforest wasn’t an easy feat when you didn’t know where you wanted to go. Gordon realized he really only had one option. He wasn’t too happy about it.

Gordon walked onto the airstrip and saw the rusty old plane. It looked like it would crash and burn if you touched it. Gordon felt a looming sense of dread about this whole plan. 

“Gordon, my man!” Next to the plane stood a tall man waving at Gordon. 

Gordon let out a long sigh. “Hello Alton,” Gordon said with zero enthusiasm.

“I can’t believe you invited me to fly you there. I won’t let you down! The great Alton Brown and Gordon Ramsay will find the lamb sauce.” Alton Brown had a silly grin on his face. Gordon was worried. Alton got his license about 3 months before and had never flown as far as Peru.

“Hurry up.” Gordon climbed up into the co-pilot seat.

“Yessir,” Alton saluted. 

The plane lifted off. They were off. 



Gordon awoke to the plane violently shaking. There was a loud beeping accompanied by a flashing red light on the dashboard. Smoke filled the cockpit. He looked to his left to see Alton wrestling the controls in what seemed to be a losing battle.

“What’s going on!?” Gordon yelled at Alton.

“Don’t worry old chap, everything is under control,” Alton said in a mock British accent.

Nothing was under control. In minutes the plane was tree level. A line of tree wreckage was left behind the plane. Miraculously, Alton and Gordon left the plane unscathed.

“Great flying! How are we supposed to find the temple now?” Gordon yelled. 

“Look.” Alton pointed behind Gordon.

Gordon turned and saw an enormous stone brick temple looming in front of them. It was overgrown with so many vines you might think it was made of leaves.

“Well what are we waiting for? Let's get that lamb sauce!”

The inside of the temple was filled with vines and bushes. The air was stale but smelled strangely good. The temple opened up to a massive room with a pedestal in the center. On the pedestal there was a button. Gordon cautiously approached.

“Here goes nothing,” Gordon whispered to himself. He pressed the button and heard some shifting gears all around him. The top of the temple opened and a sea of lamb sauce poured down covering Gordon and Alton. 

“What is this?” Gordon tasted the lamb sauce. “It isn’t even good!”

“Hahahahahaha!” Gordon turned around and to his surprise saw the man from the therapy office on the ground laughing. “I got you good!”

Alton, realizing what was about to happen, quietly slipped away.

Gordon was fuming. He stared at the therapist, silencing his laughter. The last thing the therapist saw was Gordon Ramsay charging directly at him.


The author's comments:

This piece if I'm being humble is a work of art. The greatest story ever written is right here being submitted to your website. Behold its excellence. 


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