It's not easy living in the world of hate. The government has taken over far more than necessary, and it's no use. We can't do anything about it.

In my world, there is nothing. Nothing but black. Just me, and nobody or anything else.

In my world, there is serenity.

Unfortunately, that will never happen.

The year was 2158 when the government perfected the Memory Wiper. Sounds harmless, right? Wrong. This device was used to wipe the minds of criminals after they've been interrogated so that they can be released back into the world and contribute to society. If they resist, they're killed.

The government wasn't sure, though, if it would work properly. So they drafted people to practice on. My brother was selected. I should mention this; he's not my brother anymore.

I don't know what they did to him in there or how the Memory Wiper works. All I know is one day he was shipped off to the capitol and I never saw him again. He was my best friend, and the government took him away from me. That was when I became an outcast.

It was just me and my brother and my dad in this cruel world and when my brother was selected, my father went into a deep depression. I had to grow up pretty fast. I was 14 when Brady was selected. Now I'm 17 and I've never been so alone.

Dad never got over losing mom in the factory fire, and now his son was gone for good too. All he had left was his disappointment of a daughter.

I tried for a while to be what he wanted me to be, a perfect little girl who got good grades and knew how to cook, but it just wasn't working for me. So I left him... Figuratively.

I say figuratively because I'm still living with him and I still talk to him but I'm not his daughter anymore. I'm my own person. I dropped out of school so I could get a job and support myself and him, and he didn't like that very much. He doesn't love me like he loved Brady or Mom.

He would always say to me “Vanessa why can't you be like your mother and learn how to iron my damn pants,” or “Vanessa why can't you be more like Brady and take responsibility for your actions.” He didn't appreciate me or love me. So I left him.

One day I came home from work, I got the mail like I do every day. Bills, bills, magazine subscription, letter from Cousin Sue, bills, I flipped through the junk. On the bottom of the pile of bills was a thick envelope with Vanessa Bethany Miller written in sparkly gold ink. Turning it over in my hands, I realized that it was from the government. It was the same kind of package that Brady got when he got selected.

I knew what would happen if I just threw it away and didn't open it. “Personal Contact,” they called it. Members of the military would come to my house and force me out. So I got a pair of kitchen scissors and carefully opened the mysterious package.

Out came the following; a thick packet, a badge, and a few photographs. I studied the items suspiciously. When I heard my father coming down the stairs, I quickly shoved everything back into the heavy envelope and hid it in my bag that was sitting on the kitchen table.

“Hey Dad,” I said nonchalantly.

“Vanessa,” he mumbled.

I knew he wasn't one for small talk, so I grabbed my bag and an apple and headed up to my bedroom where I could look at my mail in private. I looked at the front page of the packet, which read, “RECRUITMENT #6132, CADET VANESSA B. MILLER” in bolded black font. I flipped to page one and read the entire thing.

Was this a joke?

The packet had all the information about the Memory Wiper and many of the governments other secrets. The photographs were evidence of what the government was doing, and the badge was small, gold and rectangular with my initials engraved in fancy letters.

One the final page of the packet was an agreement. There was a place for my signature and the date. If I signed this paper and sent it back, I would be part of a secret society that wanted to take down the government. I knew I couldn't show my father, for he would just say the same thing when Brady got the selection letter. I didn't want to go there.

I put the packet, pictures, and badge in my wooden bedside table drawer and closed it tight. I lay down on my matching bed and clutched my brother's old pillow close to me. The way I see it, if I signed the paper, maybe I could find out what happened to Brady.

When 6 o'clock rolled around, I decided it was time to order dinner for me and Dad, so I phoned the local Thai food place and ordered some delivery.

We ate in silence.

The next day, I sat down at my desk and carefully signed my name in black ink. I the agreement in a plain white envelope and used the return address on the package. I dropped my letter in the mailbox and waited.

It was weeks before I got any kind of answer. The packet had said that if I chose to agree, the society would contact me and tell me what to do. No letters, no phone calls, no signs, nothing for weeks.

Then, just before my birthday in November, I got a phone call. It was around eleven at night when the phone rang. I answered it with a sleepy “Hello?”

“Is this Miss Vanessa B. Miller?” a robotic voice inquired.

I sat straight up in bed. “This is she.”

“You have agreed. Please prepare for migration. You will be teleported in T-minus 3 and a half minutes,” the voice said, and then there was nothing.

I jumped out of bed and undressed from my night clothes and put on dark jeans and a plain black tee shirt. I grabbed my bag from my desk chair and pulled in my hairbrush, toothbrush, and other necessities that the packet had suggested I bring. I pulled on Brady's varsity jacket and sat on my floor, waiting for the teleport to take me away.

I looked at my clock radio and saw that it had been three minutes. I knew I couldn't just leave, so I quickly scribbled a note for my dad on a piece of loose leaf paper that was lying on my desk. Just as I signed my name, I felt myself being teleported. I could feel the atoms in my body being disintegrated and lifted away into the atmosphere.

And then it was over. Next thing I knew I was standing in an all white room with no windows and one door. I tried to turn the handle but it was locked.

“Vanessa Miller,” the same robot voice from the telephone spoke.

“Yes?” I questioned. I was so confused.

“Welcome to the Society of Secrecy in Government Overthrow. You are Cadet Miller, recruitment number 6132. We have selected you because of your hatred for the government and your keen sense of direction. Please do not move while we unlock the door.” I stepped back a little from the doorknob. I listened to various clicks and hisses and the door popped open. I stepped through it to see a room filled with giant monitors and computers. There was a big three-dimensional map of the capitol in the middle of the room.

It was filled with people but was in no way crowded. A woman came up to me, dressed in a suit, panty hose and very high heels, smiling. “Hello Vanessa. Did you have a safe migration?” the woman asked cheerily with a thick European accent.

“I guess so... I don't really know where I am though,” I said, confused.

“Welcome to Headquarters. I am Veronica and I will be your mentor for the next few weeks.”

“Can you please explain to me what the hell all this is about?”

“Didn't you read the packet?” Veronica turned on her heel and began walking very quickly towards the exit.

Struggling to keep up, I managed a breathless “Yes.”

“Well then let me summarize. This is a secret society that plans to take down the government. You have been chosen because you have pure hatred towards everything related to our government.”

“They took my brother.”

“Yes, and we took him back. Unfortunately, not before his memory was erased. I'm afraid he won't know who you are or remember anything about you. We've told him who he is and about his life, but he will not remember you or your family.”

“That's not fair.”

She suddenly stopped and turned around to face me. I nearly ran into her. “That is why they need to be stopped.”

We continued walking down a long corridor with lots of doors until we got to room 6132. “This is your room,” Veronica said, slipping a key into the lock.

The door opened to a decent sized room with white walls, tan carpeting, and plain white furniture. “Feel free to decorate this as you like. You won't be spending too much time in here other than to sleep, but do what you fancy,” Veronica smiled. “I will come get you at lunch.” And with that, she shut the door behind her.

There was a curved white remote sitting on the white bedspread. I clicked a button and with a whoosh sound, the bedspread turned grass green. I pressed it again and the spread turned a deep fuchsia. I realized that this was what Veronica had meant by “decorate this as I liked” I pointed the remote at the walls and they turned a deep sunset orange color. I pointed it at the plain white curtains on the window and they turned a similar pink to the bedspread.

I continued playing with the buttons on this magical remote until Veronica came and collected me at lunch time. I was very impressed with the technology here.

We made our way down to the cafeteria where, you guessed it, everything was white. It was blinding but everything did seem cleaner. Veronica got me a tray and filled it with food. We sat down at a nearby table and I ate lunch. While I ate, Veronica talked. She told me about what we would be doing and how things would be done.

I listened to her always. The only time I don't listen to Veronica was when the big boss, Mr. Bloom, told me something directly. He was the head of the entire society, so what he says is what you do: no questions asked.

I found out I would be working on the floor with all the computers. I would be part of the recruitment team and I would find people best fit for certain jobs. Apparently, this was one of the hardest tasks of all.

“You will be working with your brother,” Veronica said casually.

“Wait, what?” I gasped, almost choking on my water.

“Yes, Brady, right?”

“Yeah that's him.”

“Yes he will be your supervisor,” she said, looking down at her notepad.

I was speechless. I was going to get to see my brother again. I smiled and hurried to finish my lunch so I could go see him.

We walked down the corridor to the big computer room. Just outside the sliding glass doors, Veronica stopped me. “You need to remember something, Vanessa. He may be your brother, but he doesn't know that. You can't do anything to confuse him or disrupt his brain. The Memory Wiper, as it turns out, is not permanent, so he may be able to remember you one day but today, you're just a new recruitment. Got it?”

“Got it,” I said with a sad tone. I knew he wouldn't recognize me, but I knew it would be really hard not to run up and hug him.

We stepped through the doors and there he was. Brady. 20 years old, tall, muscular, and the best brother in the universe. My best friend. Tears came to my eyes as I shook his hand and looked into his face, not recognizing me in the slightest.

The next few weeks were the hardest I had ever endured and part of the reason was that I couldn't get Brady to recognize me. Veronica said the “waking up” process that Headquarters had developed for use after the Memory Wiper could take a long time.

The time that I spent alone with Brady were the hardest, because I just wanted him to be my brother again. I cried myself to sleep every night.

I was a good worker, Brady reported to Mr. Bloom after about three months of my working with the society.

Veronica and I were fast friends. She was my mentor but I appreciated her company more than she ever could have known. I felt so lonely even though I was constantly surrounded by people. I never missed Brady more than when I was with him. Slow process, my ass.

My days were long, and nights were short, and the only bliss I got was when I slept, and even then I saw the horrors of my world come crashing down.

As if the nightmares weren't enough, Veronica was leaving me too. She was getting a promotion and leaving the recruitment floor. “But why? I need you Veronica, you're my only friend!”

“I know sweetheart but you have learned enough that you don't need a mentor anymore. You could be a mentor now.”

“No I can't! I hate people!”

“Don't need to tell me twice. I know that,” she said with a half smile.

“Please don't leave me here.”

But she left me anyway. Just like Mom and just like Brady.

I had to think of a way out. I didn't even want to think about how my father was getting along without me. He needed me so he wouldn't die of loneliness.

One day while searching through possible secret agents, I thought of a way out.

“Brady, what would you say if I told you I knew how to get out of here?”

“Vanessa, you are a child. You don't know the first thing about saving us.”

“That's where you're wrong. I have access to all these databases. I bet we could figure out how to get into the capitol and destroy that machine.”

“That is how I know you are a child,” he said with a laugh.

“What?”

“The Memory Wiper is a myth. It's not a real machine. The whole reason we're here is to take them down. Not destroy a machine.”

“It's not a myth,” I whispered.

“Don't mumble, it's unbecoming,” he snapped.

I couldn't keep it in anymore. I needed my brother back. “Brady you're my brother. When you were 18, you got a letter from the government saying that they had selected you to test out the Memory Wiper. You left on a train on my fifteenth birthday and I never saw you again until a few months ago when I first got here. I was supposed to keep it a secret because the 'waking up' process is slow and I wasn't supposed to confuse you. I need my brother back. You're my best friend and I need you.”

There was no response from Brady. His eyes looked confused and I wasn't sure what to do. “Please Brady... remember. Remember me,” I pleaded.

“Nessie?” Brady said quietly. That was his special nickname for me when we were little.

“Brady!!” I screamed and threw myself in his arms. He hugged me tight and I began to cry for the first time since he'd left. “Brady we miss you so much. Dad hasn't been the same since you left.”

“I remember everything... I even remember where I was. I remember everything...”
One Year Later

The government has been overthrown. The Memory Wiper has been destroyed. Brady, Dad, and I live together in happiness. I went back to school and graduated third in my class. Brady got a good job and so did Dad. We are going to be okay.