As I lay down on the field where I grew up, all that I can think is what am I going to do now? This house and this farm has been a part of my family for generations and this can’t be the end. This field has been the place where I can just calm down and appreciate the beauty of this farm. I can’t let this place go, it’s the only place I have left since my husband passed from a mysterious disease. Before he passed, I said to him: “I promise that I will never lose our house.”

Earlier this morning, I went out to feed the cows, chickens, and sheep before breakfast. Right before I made my pancakes, I heard a thud on the door and I jumped a little. I started to worry, so I looked out the window, and it was the cops. I froze like a statue because it reminded me of when the cops told me that my husband was dead. I hesitantly walked to the front door and opened the door. There were two cops and the taller one walked in my house slowly and sat down on my wooden table, while the shorter one waited outside. 

The tall cop made a loud sigh and said in a deep tone: “Hi, Ma’am. How are you doing? I know this is going to be hard to hear, but you can no longer live in this house because the bills aren't being paid and the house is no longer useful in this area.” He didn't sound serious at first and I thought he was joking, but when I saw his face, I knew. I knew it was true.

“A construction team is coming tomorrow to tear it all down. You have 24 hours. Again, I’m sorry and have a good night dear.” As they walked away, I closed the door and I started bawling my eyes out and dropping like how the titanic went down.

I got up and ran to the field and I swear I saw the tree make a sad face. I can’t believe this is happening, I thought. I could feel everything and everyone laughing and mocking at me as I said goodbye to my house. I turned my body toward my house and remembered everything that happened. 

I remember the first time I rolled down this hill. I remember riding my bike. I remember the first time my friends came over to this house. I remember all the smiles and laughter that was in this home. Even though people think this house is useless and a dump, it’s not to me or my husband. I just want my kid to grow old here. I want my kids to assimilate with my life. 

As I lay down on the field where I grew up, all I can think is what am I going to do now?