The familiar white noise of babbling teens hit me like a sack of potatoes; the cold metal doors swung open revealing what, to an outsider, would look like an elaborately decorated prison for adolescents. I walked quietly to where I could inspect the mass of youngsters without coming off as creepy. My khaki shorts sat fitted on my waist beneath a generic Diamond button-up. I had to dress up to par to avoid the risk of coming off as unique. While walking with a confused and slightly disgusted look on my face the ambient blend of voices gradually begun to sound more and more like clucking chickens. That's all we were, really: chickens pecking at gossip and awkward small talk buried beneath insincere smiles and forced laughs. Like we were all consciously playing a permanent game of charades, acting as the same person without ever advancing or finishing and returning to real life.
A familiar stranger separated himself from a flock of other students my age, he excitedly galloped over to me wide eyed and already laughing even though I hadn't said anything. We asked each other empty questions that neither of us actually cared for the answer to.
"Alright man, see you around." I said. The conversation quickly took its toll on me.
"Later bro, stay swaggy!"
I sighed with relief, my first encounter with a peer went smoothly, only several thousand more useless conversations to go. The ringing bell turned everyone's mood sour, liking school was not okay. I walked into class quietly ignoring the teacher to avoid coming off as a brown noser. Three cute girls in highwasted shorts were already taking an instagram picture; one minute they were best friends smiling and annoyingly giggling, but the next they were in a heated debate over which hash tag would be correct for the situation. This resulted in more instapics with the unanimously agreed upon #friendsagain.
Our new teacher made some bad jokes with high hopes for a laugh or two. We all stayed silent though, humoring the teacher was an unforgivable sin; the silence was to remain unbroken until a pretty girl sneezed, in which case we'd all say "bless you" and snicker at her adorable cartoon like expulsion of hot gas.
The teacher began her lesson by asking us how our summer reading went. The smart kid raised his hand which angered everybody because volunteering to answer questions was a sign of conformity, and conformity was anything but cool. His name was called and he brought up strong points about the novel he read. He made connections. He made inferences. He spoke with confidence (not okay) and self reliance. The whole class sighed with annoyance and rubbed each other's temples to numb the migraine caused by intelligent discussion.
The teacher nodded and smiled at the student, agreeing with several of his points before requesting another student's feedback. We remained silent. The teacher frowned, and pointed at me.
"Me?" I asked. I was already sweating.
"Yes."
I looked at my classmates, they twirled their hair, chewed gum, and doodled upside-down crosses and hip-hop lyrics on their syllabi. The smarter student eyed me and nodded. His eyes lacked insecurity, something I wasn’t used to. They reassured me that voicing my true opinion was okay.
"Um.."
"Go on..."
"I didn't read a book."
The teacher looked disgruntled, bamboozled by my blank response.
"Reading is dumb TBH." This was my reply. False and cold. My classmates stared, awestruck.
One of the selfy girls stood up, and started to applaud. Everyone else followed. One by one, my peers left their seats, some with tears in their eyes, others hugged, some bowed down and thanked Yeezus with a quick prayer to the God of alternative rap.
"Truthishly, that was the most trillest thing I've ever heard." Said a friend of mine.
My classmates fell to their knees under the exhaustion of applause and reverence. I leaned back in my chair and smiled.
I made it brah.