“And the winner of the 7019th fullness games is... Kantkiss Neverclean!

That was the last thing I heard.

It all started when my sister Prim & Proper was called for the fullness games, then I blatantly risked my life to save her.

I met a few people along the way, including a drunk guy, a fat kid named Pita Bread, I like to call him Jacob, and my boyfriend, I like to call him Edward. My boyfriend is the most handsomemest person in the world, but as the little fat kid pretended to love me in public, I somehow fell for him even though he's a loser werewolf and my boyfriend is an awesome vampire and they're just keeping Jacob in because of the fanbase. Oh, wait, that must have been my past life, but I can see the connection. Pita was a loaf of bread, this was apparent because all he did was loaf around all day. I managed to get full support from the game makers by accidentally shooting one in the head, instead of the apple that I was aiming for. But they cheered, because no one liked that man anyway. Everybody in the city dresses like a second rate Lady Gaga, don't ask me how I know about her, it must have been my other life. The only person who doesn't dress like that is my beautifier, Sinner, or as his friends call him, Cinnabon. He actually lit me on fire, but everybody cheered, cause they thought I was awesome. Luckily I only got minor burns and a toe amputated. Aside from that this thing was the best thing that happened to me in my life, it was the first time I was able to eat raw maggot tongue, alligator liver, monkey brains, etc. It was the most I'd ever eaten in my life. For a few days of bliss, I was actually glad I was picked.

Two of the most notable competitors were these two aussies. Kangaroo, and Steve Irwin, who would go to great lengths to save her. Then there was this big dude, Kate was his name I think. I didn't hit him and he didn't hit me, so he said “We even, next time, I kill you.” I have to admit, I thought that was pretty weird. I think there's something wrong with his mind. The rest were either people who did this for a living, or were not notable one single bit.

“May the odds be never in your favor,” the platforms started to raise, and pop music started blaring, and right in the middle was a woman in a meat dress singing about a telephone. Cinnabon had told me about how she was there to atract a wider audience, but they were not doing it at halftime this year, then he gave me the example of the Superbowl; to hell if I know what that is.

Soon the singer's platform descended and something related to thanksgiving appeared. “Cinco, Quatro, tres, dos, uno.” This too was to gain views, this time from the Spanish community, “BOOM.” The landmine in front of someone exploded.

“Sorry, there will be a short delay while we clean up this kid's strewn and scattered and mangled and mutilated and disfigured remains.”

“BOOM”

“Please stand by, we are suffering minor technical difficulties.”

“Okay it's fixed, five, four, three, two, one!” A gunshot was heard marking the beginning, a kid dropped dead from the impact of the bullet. “Oops,” said the announcer, “Who replaced the blanks again? Tod? Oh come on Tod, you know that's not funny.”

I ran right to the center, and took as many things as I could. No one had followed. They had all run away, obeying their trainers. Then I realized that I had been stupid by not running away, I should have obeyed the drunk guy. So I ran away.

A few hours later I was really thirsty, “Man, I am so thirsty I could really do with a root beer right now.”

Just then a monkey in a parachute fell from the sky, he was carrying a note. It said, “look to your left.” I did, there wasn't any root beer, just water. I didn't see how that would help. “Yeah so?” I yelled up to the sky. Just then another monkey fell from the sky, but this time it didn't have a parachute. The note said “Sorry, I couldn't afford a parachute, I’m paying by the letter so...” the letter ended, he must have run out of funds, oh well, I could still try to make root beer. A few hours later, I was practicing climbing trees. Then I saw a bees nest. Everyone in the land is deathly allergic to bees, so I stayed in the tree.

Soon a bunch of people saw me, but they couldn't climb up the tree cause I just threw rocks on them. Then They started a fire and went to sleep, why they didn't light the tree on fire I had no clue. I saw Kangaroo she was pointing to the bees nest. She had a good point, I would throw it at her. When I picked up the hive, I accidentally dropped it. And it hit the people who had the fire and killed some of them. One stung me and I started hallucinating about pink polka dotted elephants. When I got out of it, there was fire, then I realized the fire wasn't a forest fire, it was fire from a machine gun. The sadistic gamemakers were driving me toward the others for an epic battle. I dodged every single bullet, except one that barely grazed me; soon it stopped. I was getting really hungry, this shouldn't be called the fullness games, I haven't eaten anything at all. It should be called the hunger games, not the fullness games.

I still hadn't gotten root beer, I think that was the root of all my problems. I look to the distance I see a mountain it looks like it's covered in snow. I begin my trek. When I reach the mountain I realize that the snow is actually icing. I follow the red streak of icing and accidentally step on someones face. It is Pita Bread, he was badly injured, this was good, because if he ever died I could eat him, I bet he tasted like chicken... or would he taste like bread? He had disguised himself quite well. Who knew cake decorating would come in handy. I dug him out and we found a cave to stay in. Soon there was a monkey, it had another note. On the note it had a picture of a kissy face on it. Now the drunk guy was sending kissy faces to me. He apparently wanted me to kiss him. But I couldn't, he wasn't here. I went back into the cave. This time another monkey fell from the sky, it had another note on it this time it had a kissy face pointed at bread. I took the bread that I got from the center in that Thanksgiving thing and kissed it. Yet another monkey fell from the sky, this time it landed on me. “Ouch,” I yelled. I looked at this paper: it had a kissy face pointed toward a fat guy. He wanted me to kiss Kate, the hulking big guy. I looked around, I didn't see him, I'd kiss him tomorrow. As soon as I went back into the cave, a booming voice said, “Come to the center for what you need most.” I knew what I needed most, a root beer. “Don't go,” said Pita Bread. I didn't care what he had to say, I was going to get my root beer.

At the center there was a table, I walked toward it and grabbed the bag, then I walked back to the cave. I opened the bag and inside was a lotion, not root beer. I was angry, that root beer is what I needed most. What made me even more angry is that Pita was using the lotion that I had fetched. I didn't have an outburst though.

Later we were out in the forest looking for food, I still hadn't eaten anything and I still hadn't gotten any root beer. I picked a few deadly berries, who knew when they would come in handy. Then I saw a dog that looked vaugely familiar. Oh yeah Dogface, she was one of the contestants, this was absolute proof of reincarnation. The dog came up to me. I reached my hand out to pet it. It reached out its neck and bit my finger.

“OW!” I yelled, screaming at the top of my lungs. "I need a bandaid!"

I began running to the center, maybe there was a bandaid in the big Thanksgiving thing. Pita Bread followed. We climbed up on the thing in the center and waited. Soon Kate tried to join us. But I knocked him off with rocks. Then something caught my eye. It was a kangaroo, then I realized how much it looked like Kangaroo. The kangaroo attacked Kate and started tickling him. He must have been in total agony. “Should I put him out of his misery?” I asked Pita. He nodded. I'm sorry to do this to you, but it has to be done.”

“No! Don't! I'm having the time of my life, that's why I'm laughing.” I didn't believe him, so I threw a boulder on top of him, smashing in his head.

The animals left, and me and pita bread hopped down from the thing in the center. “I know how to really make the game makers angry,” I said to Pita, “Here take these berries and make sure to swallow. I will too. I pinky promise,” I held out my pinky, and interlocked it with his. “Three, Two, One,” I threw the berries into my mouth and pretended to chew. Within a minute, Pita had died.

“And the winner of the 7019th fullness games is... Kantkiss Neverclean!” “BANG,” a gun went off signifying the end of the Fullness Games.

That was the last thing I heard.
Epilogue

“What the hell Tod? Why did you replace the blanks again?”

“Why do you keep aiming directly at their bodies?”

“Good point.”