It’s been almost a month. I have no idea where I am. I was captured by the Japs when they ambushed my well we were sleeping. Everyone was killed except for me, I am the lone survivor. You could say I was lucky that they spared my life but now i'm realizing maybe I am the unlucky one. It’s been haunting me every night. The nightmares are more evil, yet more realistic whenever I close my eyes. This is only because I am beginning to grow insane, I’ve heard of this happening to men and it’s all because of this damn war. I’ve been beaten to the point where my body cannot move because of the excruciating pain that punishes me and forces me to stay still.  The scars on my body will heal eventually but one thing that will haunt me my whole life is the constant pain from the war I am fighting in my head. My brain is telling me that I am dead, but the last bit of humanity in me is trying to pull me back to reality.

    I have no idea what is going on outside of this small dark cave I have been locked in for the last two weeks. I have been keeping track of how many days have past, but eventually it is going to get to hard to count them all. I have not seen the sun, or trees, nature, not even water. I’ve only seen one person, the same jap who throws a piece of bread in my cell once a day. I do not feel like the same person that I once was, I wonder if I am still human. I would never know, I have not seen my reflection in forever. I’ve been living in this dark hell and I cannot see a foot in front of me. In hell there is no light , the darkness taunts you. it removes all the colors that make you a human. Darkness constantly rips you to pieces, if you try to think of your good memories it blocks your good thoughts, it dictates your brain. You will think of your worst nightmares and replay the memories you want to forget. All you’ll want is to see the colors in your life, but it is impossible to see them, because they no longer exist. these colors are more than just colors, they represent the love you express, and the beautiful moments in life. I  learned the hard way that you don't realizes how precious they are until they're gone.
   

When you are a prisoner of war you are not just stripped of your physical freedom, but your mind is no longer free as well. They want to suck the life out of your head, then fill you up with a poison that will destroy your mind. Your body is alive but your but mind is long gone. I no longer can move or talk. I haven’t seen or talked to an American Since I was captured. All I want is to hear about American life, I want to hear about families, sports teams, movies, celebrities. Just anything that will remind me of who I am and where I came from. I realized that now that even the people I used to hate and ignore were a lot more important than I thought, those same people I would do anything to see and talk to.
       

Sometimes I sit and wonder if I will ever get out of here. The war could be over for all I know I'll never know if we defeated the Japanese or If they invaded America. I think about Europe, did did they take out Hitler or is he terrorizing the whole world. It haunts me to think that there still could be innocent people out there getting hurt. My family, my wife, my children. I would do anything just to hear if there safe. The thoughts of not knowing kills me worse than thinking about everything going to hell.
      

Back home I had two beautiful kids, Malcolm, and Rosie. Malcolm is 10, everyday when I would come home from work he would be waiting hiding trying to scare me as I walked up the driveway. Then Rosie was two, she was the most beautiful child I ever layed my eyes on. She had brown hair with the biggest sparkling blue eyes. I couldn't look at her and not smile because of how perfect she is. Then there is  my wife Mary. She was my life, I loved her so much ever since I fell for her back in the 9th grade. I had spent 7 of my 24 years with her. I would do anything to be able to see her again. I can't explain how much I miss my family I feel like half a person without them. I haven't seen them in two years now. It kills me more and more everytime another month goes by where I can't see them.
       

It's been almost 3 months now since I was captured, I've heard a lot of commotion and yelling from the japs outside my cell I wonder if something is happening, but then when I think it doesn't matter. I'll probably be dead by the time anyone finds me. In the past 3 months I've lost over 50 pounds at least. My body is now just a skeleton my legs feel so thin that if I was to walk they would snap from under me. I've been getting fed less and less often. Maybe they're running out of stuff to feed me, or they're slowly trying to starve me to death.
       

Today has been different the guards are more aggressive than they've ever been. They came in my cell and beat me senseless for no reason I've heard them screaming at each other in panic, I've been trying to keep up with everything by listening to them. A man came to my cell and pulled me out for the first time in months. The sunlight burned my pupils as the doors opened. I tried to stand up but couldn't because my legs were so weak the man dragged me over to a table with other japs sitting at it. There was one jap who looked at me he started speaking he was talking in English.

He said "You have grown weak"
I just stared at him not saying anything.
He said. "You haven't heard yet"
I said "what are you talking about?"
"The emperor has surrendered" he said. 

"You're free now" .

I could not talk, why was this man letting me free so suddenly everything I doubted in the past months has finally came true. When he said that it blasted me back to reality. I felt as if I was human. I started crying I dropped to my knees and let out everything that had been trapped in me. This was when I realized that all the faith I had finally came true. I am free.