Are you still here? | Teen Ink

Are you still here?

February 5, 2023
By Behappyandrelaxed PLATINUM, Shenzhen, Other
Behappyandrelaxed PLATINUM, Shenzhen, Other
27 articles 6 photos 0 comments

I curled up in the corner, tears tried up on my face. 
 
“You will never come back, right?”, I whimpered hopelessly. I looked up and skimmed around the house, then burst into tears. They were everywhere, your items were everywhere. Your food bowl was on the curtain, your toys were scattered over the ground, your little clothes were placed on the sofa, your photos were hung on the wall, and your favorite snack was still on the shelf. I lowered my head, glimpsing at a piece of paper. This was your final examination report sheet. When I wanted to stand up, I seemed to touch something: Cat hair. Yes, you were everywhere.  
 
It was two weeks ago, when I figured out that there was something wrong with Coco, my cat. That morning, Coco hid under the book shelf and began to gasp, as if he could not catch his breath. In a sudden, Coco fell to the ground and stopped moving. I would never forget the feeling of heartbreak that I had experienced at that moment. Arriving at the hospital, the doctor checked Coco’s condition and implemented the oxygen inhaler. During the process of oxygen inhaling, Coco’s condition did not improve: his breath rate per minute reached more than 70, while a normal numerical value for a cat should be under 40. In no more two hours, the doctor made me sign the "Critical Illness Notice". Before I could say anything, my tears began to fall. I couldn't stop shaking. When I was signing, my fingers were shaking; when I was replying the doctor, my mouth was shaking; when I was walking to Coco, my legs were shaking.

Everything happened so fast that I didn’t realize that I ran out in my pajamas. 
 
Everyone told me to move on. But no one knew how difficult it was for me. It felt like drowning in a huge ocean, your lungs were going to explode and your only choice was to bear it. 
 
I decided to go for a walk. I took the cat hair in my hand. The November sun shone on the trees, people who were under the sunshine took off their coats and enjoyed the sunbathing. At a glimpse of this scene, I bundled up my sweater, the sunshine was still not able to warm my freezing heart. I kept walking without knowing where to go. I left my house with a sun on the sky and arrived at the destination with a moon behind a mass of cloud. An intense smell of disinfectant blew over my face: I got to the hospital. I couched by the vending machine beside the front door with gentle wind touched my cheeks.  
 
“You must have gone through a tough time, haven’t you?”, asked by an old lady. She smiled to me and handed me a can of coffee.  
 
“I am currently on the edge of collapsing,” I gave a bitter smile.  
 
“You know what, my dog passed away a month ago. I was in the same condition as you are. My old buddy has been with me for nearly eighteen years! That was a long time.” The old lady stopped for several seconds, “And an interesting thing happened. During the last month, I have met many dogs on the street, far more than I used to meet when my old buddy was still here,” She smiled, “So, I started to think that maybe my old buddy is still with me, but in a different way.” The old lady looked at the sky, “Maybe my old buddy asked his friends to look after me when he is not here anymore.” 
 
A drop of tear slid down my cheek, which contained not only the sorrow, but also a glimmer of hope.  
 
“So, keeping your spirit up, my girl.” The old lady patted me on the shoulder gently, and then went away. 
 
I stood up and leaned against the vending machine. The moon that has been hid behind the clouds gradually came out. I clenched the cat hair in my hand with a slight smile on my face. I drank up the coffee and threw it into the trash bin. Before I was ready to head to my home, I heard a soft voice behind me. I turned around. A small orange cat sat in the corner and looked at me.  
 
“Hello, little cute. Are you a friend of my Coco?” I smiled brightly. 



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