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The Illusion of Wonderland
When you are a little kid, you have this impression, this idea that nothing bad can happen to you. You think there's an invisible shield surrounding you like one surrounds Wonder Woman when she bangs her bracelets together. In a world of your own creation, there is always someone who needs saving and you are always the hero. There is never a time when you are the one that needs to be saved.
Years fly by and before you want to, you realize it's time to grow up. When middle school comes around, you find out just how different your imaginary world and the real one is. Just how wrong and naive you were. When high school comes along it only gets worse, much worse. Your so called friends are back-stabbing idiots that have turned your life into a soap opera. There is so much drama and fighting that you start to seek ways to protect yourself. To do just that, you build walls inside yourself. You develop the standard "tough girl" attitude and turn into a rebel. After this transformation, your defense system is completed and your walls have been built higher than you ever thought possible. You've got it all figured out. High school doesn't seem as bad anymore.
Then the years start to fly by and when college comes around your defense is still sound. People leave you alone and those that hang around you just want your protection. Before your freshman year of college is up, everything has become redundant. You need a change. You have grown tired of the defense that you created so long ago. You don't want to be this person anymore. You want someone to protect YOU. Habits don't change easily, they never have but days pass and you change. You don't understand or know why, but everything comes to a halt. You pack a bag, take some cash and leave everything behind, even your boyfriend that you were engaged to.
The right people start to come around and it seems that your imagination has come to life. Life has become like a wonderland, too good to be true. When in fact it has. You're trapped inside your own mind. That ex-boyfriend you were engaged to beat you to a bloody pulp when you tried to leave. When you finally got to your car you were so badly hurt that after 15 minutes of driving you crashed. The car flipped twice and was totaled. Those right people had been EMTs, police, firefighters and doctors trying to keep you alive. You can't be saved though. You have way too much brain damage to function on your own. The medical professionals at the hospital declare you as being brain dead.
After 4 months of having a machine to keep oxygen flowing through your lungs, you slip away in the middle of the night. Everyone is gone and the only people left are you and me. I'm just here to keep you company until you are ready to move on. This isn't the way your life could have ended, it's not the way anyone's life should end. It should have been fixed, but like a broken light fixture you left it to flicker, on and off. All you did was stare and wait. For what, I don't even know.
You cried and said goodbye...
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Favorite Quote:
Life is like the piano; what you get out of it depends on how you play it.<br /> It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have time~Tallulah Bankhead.<br /> "Everyone knows that there's no such thing as a cat owner."