Crave | Teen Ink

Crave

July 9, 2013
By Alexisalaska BRONZE, Aurora, Illinois
Alexisalaska BRONZE, Aurora, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity." -Edgar Allen Poe.


Delilah?
-Yes?
What’s so great about being skinny?
-I don’t know.
Then why are you still doing this to yourself?
-Because after a while, the benefits of being skinny don’t matter to you anymore, after a while you’re not doing it so you can fit into nice clothes, or to impress others. You’re not even really doing it for yourself anymore. You’re still doing it, I’m still doing it because there’s nothing left for me to do, there’s no other way, but this. There’s no other way but Ana, Mia, and Ed. They’re my only friends. They’ve been here for me when even you haven’t.


If he was even the least bit taken back by the words that had just sputtered out of my mouth he didn’t show it. He just sat back in his chair, looking a bit more relaxed then usual, maybe hinting that he indeed was overthrown by my speech, and he was just trying to convince me otherwise. Once again, someone was trying to convince me that everything was “okay” That’s why, if I live through this, I’m going to make it harder for therapists to become therapists. The last thing this world needs is a parent trusting a person with their child, and having their child becoming even more f---ed up, and Mr. Thompson was a prime example that not all therapists should have became therapists, or better yet, continue their career as therapists.

I could’ve went on for hours thinking about another career choice for Mr. Thompson but my raced mind was once again interrupted by this disgrace of a man.

Delilah, tell me something, you use the words “Ana, Mia, and Ed” a lot in our sessions, and you refer to them as “friends” could you talk more about them?
-They’re not real. I have no real friends. I’ve told you that.
Yes, then who are they? What are they?


My mind tensed. Who are they? What are they? Does this man not know anything? Does this man not know that these things are controlling my every move, what I say, do wear.. WHAT ARE THEY?

-Demons. They’re demons.
They’re what?
-Don’t you listen to a single word I say!? THEY”RE DEMONS. ANA, MIA AND ED THEY'RE DEMONS. ANA AND MIA ARE GIRLS AND ED IS A BOY. THEY'RE THE VOICES IN MY HEAD TELLING ME NOT TO EAT, TELLING ME NOT TO ENJOY FOOD, EVEN LIFE, OR MYSELF ANYMORE. THEY’RE DEMONS, AND THEY’RE KILLING ME.


The author's comments:
This is a piece from the book I'm writing called "Crave" I would really like some feed back on it. The meaning of the names are explained later in the book: Ana= Anorexia Mia= Bulimia and Ed= Ednos. These are the demons inside young Delilah's mind as she battles an eating disorder.

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