I was at my friend Alberto's house when the funniest hing ever to happen to me occurred.

My very best friend, Alberto, is already hated by teachers. Not because he is dumb, or doesn't do his work, but because he finishes his work so quickly that he never stops talking! Although I'm sure if the teachers met his five year-old brother Eli, they would quit their jobs as educators and become social workers or something.

Alberto and I were playing video games, like normal best friends would do when they are attending one another's estates, when Eli barged into the room, arms loaded with oranges ready to take aim. Alberto and I looked at each other in a worried panic and tried to stop him, but it was too late. First I saw a fruit crash into Alberto's helpless face and watched in horror as it's citrus guts contagiously filled the room. Then I realized, I was next! Before I could even blink I was being attacked by the sticky insides of an orange.

That was the first and only time I have ever beaten up a child.