It was at this point in his life, where Wes didn’t know what to believe in anymore. Wes was a standup kind of guy, he was patient and kind, and he lived an everyday life he learned to love. His entire life was built to be ripped apart by his mother. It seemed as if nothing he ever did would ever amount to anything, yet he persevered, well, at least he thought he was.
Wes started each day with the exact same routine, for each day held the same events. One could ever detest that the people he saw each day were the same ones he saw the previous day, yet he never questioned the thought. Wes wakes up each morning precisely one minute before his 6am alarm, which would annoy most people, but not Wes. He then goes to the bathroom, uses the restroom, brushes his teeth, and washes his face. No need to shower, for he did that the night before to save time during his morning routine. He never brushes his hair because that would force him to take a second of his day to care about his appearance and time is too precious for things as simple as physical appearance, or so Wes believed. Next stop is the kitchen in which breakfast is always skipped- saving time- and Wes pours himself a glass of unsweetened iced tea, always iced. Being the owner of a coffee shop has made Wes intolerant to hot beverages of any sort. Then he’s off to work, five things in under twenty minutes.
When Wes walked into his coffeeshop, he stopped at the entrance. The smell of the deep aroma was overwhelming, it was as if Wes had walked into a world and was surrounded by intangible fairies that left wisps of the deep dark aroma.The whirring of the grinds reminded Wes of home, it was the mornings that Wes’s mother chose to disappear and not come home and Wes’s father would make his special coffee and teach Wes how to use his creativity to make something beautiful. Wes remembered that feeling of uncertainty. He didn’t know if he should be happy or upset that his mother was absent and was full of guilt that those were some of the happiest days of his childhood, all the memories when his mother wasn’t in the picture were good days and he hated thinking that.  Wes had always been quiet and introverted so when his mother would have her angry outbursts that were always directed at Wes for he could never defend himself, nor would he ever try. Throughout Wes’s childhood he was ridiculed and laughed at for being nerdy and geeky, he was quiet and reserved so the ridicule never seemed to stop. There were times where he just wanted to give up and throw in all the cards, including his life. The only thing that stopped him was the idea of proving them all wrong, but he could never admit the reason, not even to himself. Wes stood awkwardly at the door, even though he built this place from the ground up with his own grit and spit he still didn’t feel as if he belonged. He’s never felt that way about anyplace not that he ever expected to, his mother was the queen at stealing self-confidence without speaking an utter word. And she stole Wes’s a long time ago.
He’s see Tony, his right hand barista, in the midst of whipping up a venti caramel frappuccino, two shots of espresso, and extra caramel sauce. The same drink Wes sees him making every morning when Wes comes into work. There is a girl in the corner, sitting criss crossed in the purple velvet chair that sinks in perfectly if you’re leg is propped up underneath you in the right angle. The sunlight streams through the small glass stained window above her and for a second the way the light reflects off her blond hair its as if she had a halo of pure light. Her green eyes shined with curiosity, and the book that was always propped on her legs gave of the aura of power and knowledge. She was all and all breathtaking. Though it wasn’t just her outer beauty that was alluring, she was kind and she was sensitive. Everyday she interacted with this young boy that to the entire coffee shop was a pain in the arse. Though she spent twenty minutes each day and sat and talked and played with the boy, it seemed as if she was the only person in the entire world that boy liked. Each day Wes walked in and she always would look up from her book at look towards the door and she would smile at Wes, she never looked up at the door any other time when it chimed, signaling someone was entering, yet she always seemed to know it was Wes. Every day Tony would tell Wes “Her name is Lennox, you should go over and talk to her. She loves Christmas and books, go for it.” Wes never did, he didn’t think that a girl like Lennox would ever sought out a man like Wes. If he only knew how wrong he was, and seeking a woman was the least of his problems.
Wes knew he would never talk to her, regardless what Tony said. That was the problem of people with low self-esteem, there was nothing a person could say to change their outlook on themselves. Wes continued his walk around the coffeeshop, checking on all of his customers. Maria, the mother of the twin boys who sat at the circular table by the cash register was still working on the custody battle for her boys with her ex-husband. They never can seem to work through anything, they’ve been at the same spot for the last nine months.Lennox is still working on her research paper for her MBA, Wes knew she was an amazing writer, he could just tell by the amount she read. When Wes passed by Lennox she was arguing with her mother, which was strange, she was always working on her essay and up until today he didn’t even think she had a phone, for she was never on it. “Mom! I’m not bringing anyone home for Christmas this year, you know I’m focusing on school over my dating life”...” You can’t just exclude me from the holidays because I don’t have a date”... “Fine! I’ll find one!” Lennox hung up the phone abruptly. Wes felt this pull to console her and try and help, but his brain pulled him back. Wes liked his life short and sweet and fit in a box, he didn’t like surprises, and the fact that his life seemed to be the same day after the next suited him just fine.
“I’ll be your date!” Wes blurted out and instantly turned red. He had no idea what came over him but he knew he had to help her. “Um, I mean if you don’t have any plans, Wes, I…”
“You know my name?!” Wes asked in an incredulous tone.
“Well, yeah, you are the owner of the coffeeshop, I see you everyday and I may have a slight crush on you.” Lennox added confidently.
Her honesty was refreshing to Wes and he couldn’t help but be drawn to her, they exchanged phone numbers and addresses and Lennox explained to him that she would only need him to come on Christmas day and that he didn’t have to bring any kind of gifts, though Wes knew he wouldn’t be able to not bring gifts. Wes planned to go gift shopping that evening, for Christmas was only three days away.
Those three days vanished as quick as a blink of the eye. Wes soon realized he’d have to tell his mother that he wouldn’t be attending the “family” christmas and he knew she wouldn’t take it well. He decided that texting her would be much simpler than having to talk to her more directly but just as his thumb hit send he was getting a call from his mother. Instinct got the better of his common sense and answered the phone.Wes’s mother yelled and yelled and yelled. And instead of yelling back, Wes sat there silently not daring to even breathe. He felt a tear emerge in the corner of his eye but he blinked it away, he couldn’t let his mother win again. After what felt like a century of yelling Wes simply abruptly hung up the phone while his mother was still speaking. That was the worst thing he’s ever done, the only thing he had ever done to speak up to his mother. Wes felt this emotion building up, he started to have a difficult time breathing, the room started to feel very small, and his hand were shaking violently and started to perspire. But just when he didn’t think he could take anymore the doorbell rang, signaling that Lennox was here and ready to go to her family Christmas.
Upon arrival, Wes knew something was wrong. He had this pit in his stomach and he didn’t know what it was or how to deal with it. He immediately started to feel that build up again in his chest and he started to backpedal out of Lennox’s parents’ house. “Hey, it’ll be okay”, Lennox said in a soothing voice as she held him by his hand to keep him steady. At the touch of her hand Wes instantly felt grounded and back to the world of reality. Christmas at the Carington’s, Lennox’s family, was everything Wes had dreamed of and more. There was laughter, storytelling, and lots of love. And just at the moment when Wes thought he may combust of happiness is when the wave of dread came roaring in. He could never truly be a part of this, his mother would never allow a happy family Christmas, and at the Carington’s he was just a poser and a fake. Wes found a corner and sank to the ground, he felt as if the world was better off without him, he will never be allowed to be happy and have the one thing he’s always wanted- a relationship with his mother. And the more he pondered the last few days’ events the more he got clouded and confused. Each day since Lennox spoke to him has been odd… it’s been different.. The thoughts in Wes’s head was swirling and were threatening to spill out. “Wes! Wes! Are you alright?!” Lennox was asking in a frantic yet hushed tone, her eyes filled with concern. Wes absorbed her facial expression and was surprised at the feeling that overcame him- he felt important and a part of something. Wes took Lennox’s hands in his own and looking into her eyes he told her everything, all of his concerns everything that had ever happened with his mother. He felt as if he had been talking for hours, and when he was finished he began to shake. There was no way Lennox would ever care for him now, not after finding all this about him. Wes dared a glance at her and when he looked in his eyes he didn’t see pity or remorse. No, instead he only saw love and brightness. Lennox gave Wes the idea to write his mother a letter that held everything he’s ever wanted to say. Wes wrote the letter that very night and mailed it, not sure what to expect. Lennox said that if his mother responded then he would then know that his mother wanted to try and rebuild their relationship but if he didn’t hear from her, he would also know what her answer would be. Wes woke up a few days before not sure what to believe but as he layed in his bed that night he knew that he has finally gained the courage to act on what he’s always wanted to act on.
When Wes woke up the next morning, he went through the same routine, took the same path to work, and made his rounds in the coffeeshop. It was a normal day, except for the fact that it wasn’t. Maria had come to a conclusion with her husband on the custody battle, Tony hadn’t pestered him about Lennox, and speaking of Lennox she hadn’t even blinked an eye when she saw Wes walk in. The whole thing was strange. Wes passed the newspaper stand and the date stamped was December 22. “Hey Tony! We should really update the newspapers, don’t you think?” Wes called back. Tony looked at Wes in complete puzzlement “Boss, what are you talking about? That’s today's paper, it’s 3 days till Christmas!” At that Wes was at a lost, so he did what any sane man would do and he walked straight up to Lennox, sat down next to her and demanded she tell him what kind of prank she was pulling. When she didn’t seem to understand the question he began explaining the last few weeks to her, hoping to catch her in a bluff. Yet even after his long spill she still seemed at a complete lost. Wes was beyond confused yet that’s when Lennox thought she had it figured out. “Are you sure it wasn’t a dream?” She asked him, when he gave her a look of confusion she gave him her reasoning. “To me, a social psychology major, it sounds like you were experiencing a dream where you had the same day occurring over and over and I had a small role as well as Christmas. You then made a realization about your own relationship with your mother and subconsciously acted upon, which I think you should do in real life but that’s just my advice. It sounds very therapeutic honestly.” She tried to explain to him.
“So do you think if I wrote that letter to my mother in real life, I could handle the outcome?” Wes asked Lennox sounding scared and unsure.
“Can you?” Lennox contradicted. And it was at this point in life, where Wes didn’t know what to believe in anymore.