I wake up from a dream sometimes. The kind that you can’t recall, but still haunts you and follows you everywhere. Dream-type 53, as I called it during my childhood years. Oh yes, I was quite fond of dreams and quite the knowledge seeker during this time. Whenever I had a dream, I would write about it in my journal, making up, or giving it a number. As you can see, I had a lot of these classifications for my dreams. There was dream number one: a dream about ice cream, dream number 7: a dream where you see a princess dog drawing a picture, and dream number 53: my personal favorite. My trusted ally: and closest friend.  I know it’s strange for me to call a bunch of pictures you see in your mind while you sleep a friend. But, I never think of it as that way. Considering what happened to make me call it that.

I was 6 years old at that time. I was your typical kindergartner, drawing pictures of dinosaurs and fairy tales, and going out for ice cream when I got a gold star on a test. I would my parents for a toy at the store and get rejected, only to find it under the tree on Christmas. Life was going well for me. Then, out of the blue, my family decided to get a dog.

I remember on one Saturday me, my mom, and my dad sat down to talk about getting a dog. When they said that, I got extremely excited and began to jump up and down. A few days later, we got Maddie. Maddie was a regal looking collie, who acted like a princess. She was less active than other dogs, and spent most of her time sitting on her “throne” which was an old pile of clothes in the basement. I remember whenever I went downstairs to feed her, she would first look at the food, look at me and start growling a bit. It was only when I hid behind an old fridge we had in our basement that she would she begin to eat. I didn’t like Maddie at first, but as time went on, we became closer and closer. She sometimes came upstairs to one of my drawing sessions, and posed, like she wanted me to draw her. I always did. We eventually went out everywhere together and I even took her out to get ice cream with me and my parents once. Well, that was a mistake.

It happened as we were reaching the stand. I remember that the stand was next to a busy street filled with cars. Being that Maddie was my favorite dog, I got the honor of holding her leash. (Something only she would let me do.) But, as we were reaching the ice cream stand, I grew more impatient. Eventually, I became so impatient that I sprinted towards the ice cream and let go of Maddies leash. The next thing that happened was the sound of cars beeping, and the hanging of one sentence in the air. “A dog has been run over!”

That following night, I couldn’t sleep. Maddie was constantly on my mind. I just sat in bed, shivering like an autumn leaf, while sinking into a deep pit of darkness. I kept on blaming myself for what happened to Maddie. I kept on thinking that if I hadn’t been so selfish, Maddie would have been here with me. (Deep thoughts for a little kid,huh?) The next morning, I skipped school. I didn’t feel like going. I felt tired, and exhausted. So during the day, I fell asleep on the couch. That marked the discovery of dream 1: a nightmare about ice cream.

The nightmares continued for days after that. I kept on having dreams about dogs, princesses, and ice cream. Normal things that people wish for, turned into nightmares that woke me up in a cold sweat every time I had them. When I tried talking to my dad about it, he laughed and told me that that was a funny joke. I told my mom later, and she said that I could sleep with my parents. Though, she didn’t seem too concerned about it either. It was the night I slept with them that they finally noticed.

The next morning they told me that I was crying and calling out Maddie’s name, and that I was going to “feelings doctor” to talk about it.

The “feelings doctor”, was a new concept for me. I didn’t know that people went to doctors to talk about their feelings at that time. So I thought his office was going to have medical equipment and all the usual stuff you would find in a doctor's office. But no. When we got there at noon, there were rows, and rows of books, instead of syringes and scales. And instead of a normal doctor in white, there was a tall man wearing a suit with a clipboard. He said his name was Dr. Brown, and that he wanted me to talk about my nightmares. So, I did. I told him everything about Maddie, and the ice cream, and the bad dreams I was having. It took us about an hour to finish. After I told him everything, he asked me if I knew what a dream journal was. I did not. So, he explained it to me.

He told me that a Dream journal was a special journal where you could write about your dreams, and keep track of them. He handed me a plain black notebook and told me to write about my dreams there. I wasn’t the best journal keeper at the time, So I listed the dreams under numbers. At that time, I had seven dreams in total that I listed. Most were nightmares, and only two of them were happy dreams.On the car ride home, I filled my Notebook with drawings of the dreams. Yet, I still felt sad inside. I felt bad that I would never draw with Maddie again, or feed her her favorite food, or play with her outside. And as I went to bed that night, I wondered about what kind of dream I would have. (I was really interested in them at that point.) That was the night dream 53 came to visit me.

The next morning, I didn’t wake up in a cold sweat. And I didn’t want to go to my parents room either. For once, I was happy when I woke up. The dream I had last night made me feel happy again. I concluded with my young brain, that I had to draw the dream in order to remember it, so that I could come back to it when I felt sad about Maddie again. But as I got out my dream journal and my pen, I realized that I couldn’t remember the dream.

That dream haunted me the entire day. In school, at lunch and on the playground. I thought that if I couldn’t remember the dream, I couldn’t dream it ever again. This kept building up the more I thought about it. Eventually, I became so anxious that I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to find out what that dream was about. So, while Mrs. S. was teaching us science, I snuck out of the classroom and darted towards one of the back entrances. I eventually found myself behind the school, facing a dark unforgiving forest. This is where I wanted to look for the dream.

Without reason or thought, I went into the forest. I didn’t care about getting lost or potentially getting hurt. All I wanted to do was to find the dream that I lost. The ground was wet and slippery. My shoes began to fill up with mud and I felt chilly. After a while, I saw the sun setting through the trees. I decided to go back, but I couldn’t not before I found the dream. As I began to hurry and look for the dream, I thought about dreams and what they were. I thought about what the difference between Maddie and that dream was. In the end, I decided that If you could feel something with your fingers, it wasn’t a dream and if you couldn’t, it was a dream. Suddenly a thought went through my mind. If that dream wasn’t real, then why was I looking for it? I snapped back into my senses and asked myself, what I was thinking?  I turned back but the school was nowhere in sight! I began panicking and ran in random directions, calling anyone I could think of. Mom, Dad, Mrs. S, Dr. Brown, Maddie, anyone I could think of! And then suddenly, I tripped on the wet ground. I felt myself rolling down a hill, my head hitting something hard, and my clothes becoming wet. I don’t remember anything after that.

The next thing I felt were two arms picking me up and running with me somewhere. I remember hearing voices of people, young and old gathered around me. When I opened my eyes I was on a white bed with my parents standing above me with worried expressions. I also saw a doctor standing with them. I heard the doctor say something about me being out for 53 minutes. I felt my head covered in something. Bandages. When my mom asked me about why I ran away, I told her about how I wanted to find the dream that I couldn’t remember. I told her about how I wanted to draw it. My mom embraced me in a tight hug, and told me that, I don’t need a dream to make me feel better. I could always just talk to her, or dad, or Mr. Brown. When she said that, I knew what to draw in my notebook for that dream. When I got my notebook, I labeled my dream #53, and drew a picture of Maddie with me, my Mom, and Dad on it.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Why would I ever consider this dream my friend, after all, I did say that it wasn’t real. But, hear me out. Because of this dream, I realized that I don’t need to rely on silly things like dreams or other things for happiness, I always have special people in my life who are always there for me, no matter what challenge I’m facing.

THE END.