Summer. It was so easy to forget during the lonely summer months. There were so many things to distract me from thinking of you. I thought I had gotten over it. How could I be so stupid as to think it would be that easy?
School comes and I try to avoid you at all costs. I do not even look in your direction. I'm afraid. Do you still like me? What happened? I do not understand. Everyday it gets harder and harder. I know your voice and your laugh. When I hear you, I lose consentration. What about you makes me lose my thoughts? Why can't I control the way I feel around you? I come to school hoping to see you in the halls. I tell myself to stop. He doesn't like you. It tell myself over and over, hoping to kill the feeling inside. Third period comes and I become shakey. I drop my books by my locker. As I race around the corner, I almost crash into you. "Hello" you say as a warm smile spreads across your face. "Hi" I answer, but i cannot think of anything else. I'm lost in your ice blue gaze. I tear my eyes away from yours and stare at the ground embaressed. Shy is not me, I scream inside. Why am I only shy around you!? I'm not a shy person. I take my normal seat in class. I hear you argue with another classmate over a seat. I cautiously glance back and realize it is a seat near me. Maybe you do still like me. You do not ignore me like an annoying child. When I talk to you, you turn your attention to me as if what I am saying is actually interesting. Maybe you are shy too. I beat myself up inside when I do not take chances to stand by you or talk to you. My best friend can talk to you so easily. I wish I was like her. When you smile at me, my whole day is brightened and I cannot stop smiling myself. When I hear your voice my heart thumps out of control. Your laugh gives me goosebumps. I sometimes think that you can hear my heart beating wildly when you look at me. I wish that I could get over my fear and tell you how I feel. I hope someday that wish would come true, and that the someday would come soon. Very soon. <3