faires.

i am reminded of fairies.

and fireflies.

and stars.

and lightbulbs abandoned and shattered.

and wings crumpled on the ground.

and burned out constellations.

There is comfort in your arms but sometimes I move away from the warmth and embrace the cold because it is where I feel at home.

I know it hurts you because I see you reach out for me which hurts me and causes my eyes to fill with tears. I don't mean to be so closed off. The wall of red bricks can easily be smashed I just choose to keep rebuilding it. I don't know why.

the fireflies dance with the stars and the fairies and with my feelings and I don't neccesarily understand why they chose me but they did and I'm trying to keep up but i can't always hear the music. thank you for singing to me so that i can have my own beat and thank you for catching me when i trip over my own feet and patching up my broken heart when they leave me breathless and lost.

I really do try to push them all away and focus only on you. I love you I really do. But when they call out to me I realize how scared I really am.