From behind her desk she watched a man walk in like he owned the room. His eccentric clothes, crown, and unnatural posture told her he was a human royal.

He moved stiffly towards her, “I am King of Lapinia. I have come to inform you, the harvest in my kingdom was not enough this year. There is hardly enough for me to throw a feast or two.” 

Standing up from behind her oak desk Mother Nature stared at the whiny brat excuse for a human king standing before her. Just yesterday she had been informed he cut down a forest in hopes of building a bigger and better castle for himself, and now he had the audacity to complain about the harvest his kingdom had gotten this year. Never one to rely on her memory, she double checked her notes, and just as she thought there had been more than enough to feed the entire kingdom this year. His kingdom’s harvest was certainly much better than some neighboring kingdoms. 

 “What do you want me to do about it? It’s too late to add to the harvest or improve it in any way.”

“I don’t know or care, but fix it.” 

“You do not order me around. I am not one of your subjects, it would be more accurate to say you are one of mine.” 

“Fix my harvest so I may have feast after feast or I will punish you.” 

“I would love to see you try. Dismissed.” 

“You do not dismiss me. I am The King. I dismiss you.” 

“And I am a Goddess. I have seen many kings come and go in my time. You are not special to me.” Nature was proud of herself for maintaining a calm disposition while inside she was furious. With every privileged, spoiled, entitled word this human spoke he fed her rage more and more. Pulling rank wasn’t her favorite thing to do, but this man needed to be taken down a peg, and it clearly wouldn’t happen within his kingdom. 

He kept talking but she was no longer listening. If this was how all humans saw her she had little hope for her lands. Her pride and joy was the delicate balance of the nature of the planet, and this man was threatening it. By now her anger far outweighed her worry. 

Snapping, she used her power to get the ground and plantlife to nudge him out. The ground made small hills pushing out the door, the vines of the trees wrapped around his arm and pulled him away. He fought back with each step closer to the door, yelling about how he was the king, and she couldn’t do this to him. 

After he was finally gone she sat back down and tried to get back to work. Unfortunately, her anger only grew throughout the day. Reports of mounds of litter, people tearing up the ground for useless pursuits, and people complaining about the weather. Okay, people complaining over the weather was nothing new, however today it got under her skin more than normal. 

By the time she returned to her home she was seething. Hearing the door open she looked to see her loving husband returning home from his own job, keeping time straight around the world. 

He began taking off his shoes and putting his briefcase away, “You will not believe how many time travel requests I got today. ‘Oh, Father Time, won't you please let me go fix this mistake. If I could just go change this one problem I would be happier. I should have gotten that job, I want to right this injustice.’ I blame these science fiction and fantasy writers, minimising the dangers. Do people not understand that stuff is fiction for a reason? How was your-” he looked at her, fists clenched at her sides, frowning, and face scrunched for the first time since walking in the door, “What happened?” 

“This human king had the nerve to complain to me when there was more than enough, the same one I was informed cleared the forest. I’m thinking mudslides, the next harvest is so pitiful that making through the winter will be a struggle. I’m thinking I should have my sister put some of the animals in his castle now, that’s a great place to relocate them. Of course these are all just ideas running through my head. I don’t have a solid plan yet.” She kept rambling, thinking up every solution she could. 

Time came over to her and wrapped her in a hug, “Shh, shh. Hey, look at me. There you go. What you’re talking about is revenge, and it would kill nearly all of this king’s subjects. They are innocent, and remember what happened last time you went full revenge mode?” he waited for her to nod, “As impressive as it was the humans are still repopulating. I understand you want to punish him, but you need to hurt as little people as possible. Okay?” 

“Except this planet would be better, safer, and healthier without humans ruining it. Would it really be so bad if they were gone?” 

“You know of The Deity Deal. Humans are now the priority over every other species. We can’t focus on the greater good if it destroys humans again.” 

“What do you suggest I do then?” 

Time spent the night calming Nature down and they began discussing the best ways to hurt and get their message across to the king who threatened her. Life went on as it had before, except every night they came up with new ideas, listed what worked or not about them, and set them into piles based on effectiveness. In a few weeks, they had a solid plan ready for her to put in place. 

Over the next year She began putting the inner workings of her plan into place. She would sabotage one thing here, and another there. At first the king was none the wiser. Eventually though, he could no longer deny that what was happening was designed to happen to him by a higher power, such as a goddess he had insulted. 

Mother Nature watched as the human king grew frustrated with the land he had cleared. Nothing took. All of the wood from the forest he’d cleared was unusable for building the castle, and anything they tried to build on the land washed into the river overnight anyway. 

Every week he got the same report from the gardeners, the castle’s harvest was struggling greatly, but the crops in the outer edges of the kingdom, where the poorest citizens lived, were thriving. 

The next time she saw The Bratty King, as she had affectionately deemed him, he was once again storming into her office with little regard for what was around him. 

“YOU! You have been sabotaging me every chance you get. I demand you stop this instant or I will have you head!” 

“Give up. I have won,” She brought down a vine from the tree next to her and put it back up, “I control individual aspects of the earth. You cannot do anything selfish with the wood from the cleared trees. You may use them, build an orphanage, make them into art, use them for furniture, or to make paper. If it benefits the members of the kingdom I will allow it. Selfish pursuits, like building a castle you don’t plan to share with anyone, will not be allowed.” 

“You do NOT control me, woman. I do what I want, and no one can stop me.” 

“I am a goddess, not a woman. I can stop you. I have stopped you. There is nothing more we have to say to each other. Good day.” 

“Listen to me, I am THE KING! You do not control me. I will do whatever I want with this wood. You hear me woman? I am in charge.” 

With Nature not responding to him, he marched out of her office pretending it was solely his choice to leave. 

Curiosity sparked, Nature watched him with his queen at dinner that night. 

“I told her she couldn’t do anything and she defied me. Mother Nature will pay.” he was saying when she got there. Rolling her eyes, Nature listened to what his wife had to say on the matter. 

“She is a goddess. She could kill you if she wanted, in fact, I would be grateful she didn’t with the way you’re acting. It’s probably that Deity Deal your grandfather enacted. Besides, I agree with Mother Nature, you shouldn’t be destroying lands for selfish reasons. You brought this on yourself.” 

“I did no such thing. I am a good King, I am not selfish. Why would you agree with her.” 

“Because Mother Nature is right. Stop listening to your pride and entitled upbringing for one second you may realize it. 

After a few more dinners in which the queen used the same points against him, and seeing no other option, the spoiled king gave in and replanted the trees he cleared. It took years for them to grow and allow for the animals to return, but eventually they did. There was then a proclamation stating that no one was to take more than one tree at a time from the forest. He also, on the queen’s strong suggestion, had ordered the orphanage built in the city near the castle. 

As Nature watched she realized one thing, she wanted revenge, but got justice instead, and that was so much sweeter than any revenge could be.