Achacha | Teen Ink

Achacha

November 6, 2022
By Anonymous

He stepped out of the 13-year-old house into this newly desolate world.

The sirens were turned off and the coffin was withdrawn from the ice cream truck. He walked up to the front yard and stood beside the old decaying body. It was covered in a white linen cloth and the head was left exposed. The nostrils were sealed with cotton and the eyelids were closed shut. The boy closed his eyes and inhaled the air circulating him.

 

He reaches a  blank void that was lit by this gleaming figure.

Must be god, said the boy. He looks around this expanse and sees a white haze. It took the shape of a human. The body looked withered and had an enormous belly. The rectangular specs were touching the body’s nose and there was a wide grin. It was him.


Grandpa!, yelled the boy, I am sorry! I didn’t give enough love, he continued. I could have wished you goodbye, said the boy. I could have helped you, I could have thanked you, I could have. Stop, the spirit said, It is time for you to move on. But, you should have Face-Timed with me before I died, said the spirit. I am sorry, said the boy. It’s ok,  said the spirit. Don’t quarrel with her, said the spirit. Yes, said the boy. The spirit looks up at the mysterious figure.

It started to emit light brighter and brighter each second. The light was unbearable for me which forced my eyelids to face down. Well then, it’s time for us to part, said the spirit. The spirit flew towards that mysterious entity. He touches its light and starts to fade, slowly. The spirit sheds some light particles out of his eyelids. I’ll always be there Kutta , said the spirit, fear not cause I am not dead. “Nooo!” yelled the boy.

The spirit fades away

Long gone into a world beyond our reach

 

He exhaled, opened his eyes, and said “Achacha”. After that, he finally felt free again


The author's comments:

This set-piece talks about what occurred the instant I saw my grandpa's dead body. In this story, I copied part of Carver's writing style by using his technique for transitioning from one story to another but modified it by transitioning from the real world to an unknown realm. I used Anaphora which means the repetition of a word at the start of a sentence and played a little bit with imagery, a literary device that helps in visualizing the text when describing the setting of the dead body. The Face-Time part is pretty humorous because I used Allusion, a literary device that refers to ideas outside the text. “ Don’t quarrel with her”. My grandpa used to repeat that exact phrase every time I used to conflict with my annoying little sister. He called me “Kutta” and I called him “Achacha". This set-piece is fictitious but describes my feelings and thoughts during that period of sadness and grief. 


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