I trudged along the alleyway as I passed by neon hologram advertisements and people walking with their virtual reality headsets or breezing by with their hoverboards. I took a turn to avoid the crowd and confronted a silver wall with familiarity.  Before me stood the looming vending machine, a metallic box twice my size with a cyan luminescence that seeped out of its glass frame. I ran my finger along the different robots it had to offer and couldn’t help but furrow my eyebrows in distaste when I noticed the humanoid robots the machine presented. Humanoid robots have always rubbed me the wrong way, ever since my sister tried to scare me by saying the government put ‘unwanted’ humans inside the robots when I was little, and said I would be next. I know it’s foolish to still think about it, but I can’t help but be repelled by them when I see them afar in the street, and it gets even creepier if one of them makes eye contact with me. But I realized that I would have to move on from the silly scary stories I held onto from the past when I noticed that they were the only ones left in stock.

I reluctantly swiped my card and watched the process begin. The vending machine rumbled and ached out drilling noises of different kinds. In less than a minute, what looked like a man covered in platinum and laced with steel parts stood before me, and if that couldn’t throw me off anymore, the door of the machine flew open on its own and knocked me down. The robot slowly marched out and ominously twisted its head.

“Greetings. I am Model R, at your assistance,” He spoke in a toneless voice and neared toward me, piercing my eyes with its gaze, “How may I help you, Mara?”

“Maybe picking me up would be a start?! This stupid door knocked me off of my crutches! One flying motorcycle accident is enough, I don’t need a vending machine trying to kill me too!” I crawled over to retrieve my crutches and mumbled to myself, “Honestly…if I wasn’t like this I wouldn’t have the need for a scrap of metal like you-” 

The robot leaned forward and wrapped its arms around my body, picking me up as if I was a feather. Its head turned towards me and I couldn’t help but curiously observe its expressive face while its blue eyes stared back in a comforting manner. Maybe the manufacturer's goal was to make it seem like a real person was taking care of you? I could feel a strange warmth coming from the robot’s chest as well, which felt off…but admittingly soothing. 

“I’ll carry you to your home, Mara. I’ll make sure you stay safe.”

“...Thanks.”

While I stayed inside my apartment recovering, Model R…well, I started calling him Roger, would go outside for me to get groceries, essentials, and retrieve my work from the office. Unlike assistant robots I’ve had in the past, Roger could cook, clean, perform first aid, and talk to me if I wanted him to. It was nice to feel taken care of…but I began to feel something more. I’m not sure if it was the way he would gently apply medicine on my leg, or the way he would play my favorite songs if I seemed sad, or the way he would ask me questions about myself out of the blue, or the way he would play video games with me, or the way he brushed my hair out of my face that one time…but…I think I’m falling in love with a robot.

Of course I didn’t believe that at first, it’s not like I’m crazy or anything! I initially thought it was the medicine’s side effects, but I called my doctor and she just laughed at me. I stopped watching my rom-coms and watched true crime on T.V. instead, but I could still feel my heart beating when he would sit right next to me. I even tried ignoring him for an entire day, but that only made me want to talk to him more. I thought it would pass, but days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, and right when I thought I was over him, he would remind me all over again.

Maybe I am crazy.

One night when the moon was full, I went over to my balcony and stared at the city below. I closed my eyes and let the lights and ambiance of noise blur into my mind and absorb me. I heard footsteps gently creep up from behind as a familiar voice echoed through my ears.

“What are you doing, Mara?” Roger walked over next to me.

“Oh, just spacing out, I guess…intentionally not thinking.”

“About what?”

“About you.” I whispered. I glanced over to see if he gave any reaction, but he continued to look down at the city as if he was trying to space out as well. I moved a little closer to him and pressed against his arm. He looked down at me and gave a little smile, and that’s when I snapped. I couldn’t help it anymore. I grabbed his wrist, squeezing it, and pulled him to look at me. 

“I don’t how you’re going to respond to this, Roger, and for the record I don’t understand why I feel like this either, but…I like you a lot-”

“I like you too, Mara-”

“No! More than just a friend! I…” I lowered my head and took a deep breath. I gazed back up at him. “I’m…I’m in love with you.” He fell silent.

“Unfortunately, because I am an A.I. robot, I am not capable of human feelings.” 

“But you’re more than just that!” I moved closer in desperation, “Roger, please-”

“Unfortunately, because I am an A.I. robot-”

“I mean, from the way you look at me, to everything else you do,” I started to shake his body, “y-you mean so much to me! I think about you! You give me butterflies-”

“-I am not capable of human feelings.”

“Why?! Please, why…why can’t you understand? Why do I only feel this way? You make me feel so…special-”

“Unfortunately, because I am an A.I. robot-”

“SHUT UP!” I pushed him to the ground and he hit the hard floor.

Something cracked.

I quickly fell on my knees and started to panic. Why did I do that? Why did I push him? Why did I yell at him? Why did I expect that he’d say something stupid like ‘I love you too’? Why did I fall in love with him? Why did I have feelings? Why? Why? Why?

Why was there blood?

No…

It can’t be…

No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no NO NO NO...

I wrapped my arms around Roger and looked upon him with closer inspection. The blood was seeping from inside the head where the fracture had formed. 

CRACK!

I could only remove a small piece where his left eye was. I looked down at him. The same blue eyes before me, except I could see the silver painted human skin underneath the metal shell he was enclosed in, now streaked with blood. Tears blurred my vision as I tried to pick him up to carry him inside.

“...Mara,” he muttered, except this time there was no robotic autotune to his voice,

“I-I lo-love you too.”

And there, the man died in my arms.

The lights and ambiance of noise swallowed me once more.