I'm alive but I don't want to be | Teen Ink

I'm alive but I don't want to be

July 30, 2014
By Anonymous

She walked toward the forest to her bus stop and was never seen again. No one knows what happened to her. Of course her parents searched for her frantically but over time they just stopped. Giving up hope their daughter would ever come home again, or their daughter might even be alive. Of course everyone missed her too (her friends and family) but the image of her was fading day by day. It had been a bit over two years, and no one knew what happened to that beautiful girl. Maybe she had been kidnapped, or she decided to run away. No one knew and no one will ever know except for her and me. I think her family needs closure. Just imagine the agonizing pain of never knowing what happened to a loving family member. Of course I know what happened to her. I’m the one who killed her. I’m the one who’s made her family and friends have a hole in their heart from not knowing what happened. I’m the monster that took her away. I don’t know why I killed her, it just happened. I was just taking my daily route and the next thing I know I’m standing over her lifeless body, covered in blood. Instead of telling the police I decided to hide her some place no one will ever know where she is. I hid her in my cabin that was passed down to me from my father, no one knows I have it so it’s perfect place to hide a body. I didn’t know her why did I kill her? I took a life from a mother, father, sister, brother, everyone. I’m drowned with guilt, I don’t know what to do. Every night I have a nightmare of what I did, but it’s only parts. Last night I dreamt that I was just stabbing her over and over with blood spattering everywhere. It wasn’t the worst dream. One was where she took her last breathe, her eyes losing brightness and the life was draining out of them. The dream ended with my blood gurdling scream.



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